My boyfriend of almost a year (will be a year in a couple weeks) and I got into a fight. We have arguments and stuff and its no big deal, we work
through them and move on. But this time, he says he doesn't know how he feels about me anymore. He tells me that he doesnt know if its me or not,
and that he is afraid if he breaks up with me that he will hurt me and that a lot of people will be mad at him. But when his friends and family talk to
me, they say that he loves me and that he doesn't want to break up with me, he just is worried about other things that have nothing to do with me. He
wont talk to me very much and I really dont know what to do. I really love him, and he knows that, he just is unsure of what he feels for me right
now. I'm scared of getting hurt and losing the one I care about. What should I do?
Why hold on to someone who doesnt want you? He may seem like he loves you but he really could just love the fact that he is with you. sometimes having someone to say "I Love You" matters a lot. he shouldnt care about what his friends will think of him if he does it or not. That shouldnt be the reason that he holds on to you.
Also, If he's not talking to you theres something wrong in the relationship. He should be able to talk to you unless it is about you.
I hope everything works out.
Now hes gotten to the point where he'll talk to me. . .but he still doesnt know what he's feeling, he doesn't know if its just him, or if its me. I know it sounds bad, but hes not a bad person and I dont understand how to get him to want to talk. Everyone tells me not worry, but Its kind of hard not to worry cause I care about him so much, I really thought that we were meant to be.
Take a break for a couple of days so he can do some soul searcing. Don't call, don't text...hang with different people for a few days and maybe he can clear up his feelings..but if it works out let me know because I'm going through kind of the same thing.
Well thanks for trying and everything but he already broke up with me. I'd give the world to get him back ='(
Just be really supportive of him, obviously he's going through something.
I'm sorry to hear that he already broke up with you. You have to be strong and remember everything happens for a reason. Try to keep your mind off him by going out more, he'll always be in your mind if your doing nothing. I know you didn't want this to happen but you can't be with someone that doesn't want you. In a relationship, both people need to be happy, if one person isn't then there's no point in being a relationship in the first place. But good luck.
Don't confuse the simplicity of love with the complexity of yourself (or him for that matter). If it's not about the relationship that you two share than instead of trying to "talk" to him, give him support. There is a difference in trying to resolve matter through words and supporting someone who you love by just standing by his side. If more so than anything, it's probably have to do with something in his personal life that somehow got mixed into your relationship. Guys tend to let even one thing that has his mind racked mess up nearly everything in his universe. (Believe me, I'm solid proof). Hopefully it is something that is affecting him privately and not something about you two. Don't be down because he can't say anything to you, instead hold his hand tight to let him know you're there, words can never captivate the moment when love is acknowledged. If he's testy (which he probably will, we're guys by the way) than just stay firm and hold on tight. You'll get through it, your young and in love. Knowing that your in love is the best measure of strength, putting your heart on display and not giving a damn if it gets naysayers and such... Now I rambling.
I went through this myself not too long ago. You cannot help how you feel about somebody, just give him some time. if anything tell him you are willing to be friends until he works out what hes feeling. You cant just wait around for him to make up his mind though that is not fair to you. Tell him you dont want to play games, you just care very much about him and dont want to lose him from your life completely. Sometimes though time is all it takes.
This is in response to all of those who think that because someone needs to work out how they feel and have some space, it means that they don't really love you / want you. Thats a load of rubbish.
My sister and her partner went through that about the second year into their relationship. He didn't know if he wanted to be with her forever and wasn't sure if she was what he wanted. He put her through hell for a few days, but eventually came back and said that he couldn't live without her.
Now they have been together for 10 years, have a house together and have just had their first baby.
So to all of you who think 'you just know', that might be the case, but it doesn't mean you wont need some time to evaluate your life and where you planned for it to go.
"This is in response to all of those who think that because someone needs to work out how they feel and have some space, it means that they don't really love you / want you. Thats a load of rubbish.
My sister and her partner went through that about the second year into their relationship. He didn't know if he wanted to be with her forever and wasn't sure if she was what he wanted. He put her through hell for a few days, but eventually came back and said that he couldn't live without her."
^ I agree with you, because like your sister I went through something similar to that hell too for a few days but overcame it, with my partner, as well.