Funny quotes

If water were vodka
and i was a duck
i swim to the bottem and never come up
but waters not vodka
and im not a duck
so slid me a bottle and
shut the f**k up!!!!

:]

by xxbroken loverxx
at 2008-04-12

rating: 5.0
votes: 18


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A guy showed me a picture n said "this is me when I was younger" Every picture is when you were younger. If he was like "this is a picture of me when Im older" Id be like "WTF? Whered you get that camera?!"

by modern*day*barbie ( F )
at 2007-11-18

rating: 5.0
votes: 18


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After a year of therapy my psychiatrist told me "Well . . maybe life isn't for everyone after all."

by oNice ( F C )
at 2009-01-09

rating: 5.0
votes: 17


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The next time you're in Walmart, hide in a clothes rack and when someone is looking through the clothes come out and say "WELCOME TO NARNIA" :)

by rainwhisker
at 2011-05-14

rating: 5.0
votes: 16


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Life is like a roller coaster, you can scream all you want but you can't leave until it's over.

- Eva Catherine

by goodgirl//2008
at 2006-01-15

rating: 5.0
votes: 16


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DEAR MAKERS OF CHERRY MEDICINE,

HAVE YOU EVER TASTED A FCUKING CHERRY?

by modern day barbie ( F )
at 2012-02-14

rating: 5.0
votes: 16


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Some people are like slinkies, good for nothing but they make you smile when you push them down the stairs :)

by velvet kisses ( F P C )
at 2005-09-06

rating: 5.0
votes: 16


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A man is a king...A king is a ruler...A ruler is 12 inches...STILL THINK YOU ARE A MAN??

by eva greene
at 2005-04-02

rating: 5.0
votes: 15


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This isnt mine but its cute

when i was younger i prayed to God to give me a bike.. i prayed and PRAYED and PRAYED..then i realized God doesn't work like that.

so i stole the bike and prayed for forgiveness

by mel ( F )
at 2006-09-15

rating: 5.0
votes: 15


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I have a lil angel flying around with a hammer....each person she hits gets a lil bit of my love, I hope she knocks the shit out of you!!!!

by Brittany Paige ( F C )
at 2005-12-05

rating: 5.0
votes: 15


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