The Exorcism of a Catholic (Sedoka String)

by Maple Tree   Nov 30, 2014


Catholicism
spiderwebbed memoirs of lies
bitten by holy water.

Wine tasted bitter,
broken body was stale bread
sinful confessions ignored.

A priests eyes had seen
more demons within his soul,
than in the eyes of others.

Weeping nuns shattered-
she became an Exorcist
aborting, religion lost.

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Sedoka

The Sedoka is an unrhymed poem made up of two three-line katauta with the following syllable counts: 5/7/7, 5/7/7. A Sedoka, pair of katauta as a single poem, may address the same subject from differing perspectives.

I decided to write two Sedoka's and place them together.

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Latest Comments

  • 9 years ago

    by CuteThingsGoneWrong

    This poem is beautiful and i agree with RoP
    I might be reitterating but deal with me

    Starting off by stating the religion is powerful and your making a statement, a very loud statement to anyone who may disagree, your putting your foot down and showing you have backbone! I love it.
    Describing the lies you have been told by your religion by spiderbites is clever. Very, spiders are sneaky and they tend to poison their victims in the most vile ways. Describing them like this just proves how you believe they have wronged you, hurt you, and how they slowly kill their followers (in your opinion)

    GOing on to tell how his blood was bitter and his bread was stale for me is more like a jab at the religion saying that your savior wasnt that good himself. Your saying he had his own faults, that his blood was not pure (sweet) but vile (bitter) and his own sins have made him stale and this is is restated by the next line about the ignored sins that we and him have commited.
    Beautiful so far!

    The irony that we confess to someone who has seen more sins in himself then anything else he has heard from another person is obviously one of the biggest reasons people think the religion is a fraud. Why should we confess to a man who has seem more hell in this world then ourselves? I love how you ask that in three simple lines. People need to understand just how evil people CAN be.
    And at last weeping nuns shattered.

    I cant tell the exact purpose of this line. It feels humorous... Like she became an exorcist to escape the religion, banishing the demon that is the church considering that it is the most evil thing created and that that is the place where demons are born, created, and begin to walk this earth... I love it...

    To everlasting - I can agree to an extent. But. Ive seen both sides of every religion... Its the faith you have in the religion that make it up and chistianity gets chastised because its such a huge staple religion. People view them as pushy... And i do believe that church is evil of any type... No one should tell you how to believe whatever yu believe...

    Personal stuff anyways

    EDIT:::

    shoot forgot to say I LOVED HOW YOU DID THIS WITH FORMED POETRY. thats complicated. Never could i ever!

  • 9 years ago

    by Everlasting

    I have to disagree. It's not the religion. Sorry if along your path you encountered a catholic or more who inspired this piece.

  • 9 years ago

    by Naughtymouse

    Oooooooo MT!!!

    I DO LIKE THIS PIECE!!!

    Of all the religons i do find catholisism the worst ....and perhaps you're not far off that train of thought either lol

    I have to say that you have written this with amazing control and poise....

    "Catholicism
    spiderwebbed memoirs of lies
    bitten by holy water."

    ^^^^^^ this is a wonderful opening, Catholicism is indeed a web manufactured to snare people and reinforced by dogma and threats of hell or limbo.

    "Wine tasted bitter,
    broken body was stale bread
    sinful confessions ignored."

    ^^^^^^^^i like the reference to sinful confessions ignored, it is bad enough that this particular sect of religion actively hides wanted criminals just because they claim to be of faith.....no wonder the wine has turned and bread stale.

    I really like this piece, people tend to shy away from the inconsistancies of catholisism. - Aids in africa is bad but using condoms to stop the virus is worse? all the millions of parents who were anguished beyond comfort when their priest told them that their lost children would be condemmed to limbo as they were not baptised....only to then turn around not that many years ago and make a statement that limbo does not exist.

    I applaude you for writing this piece 5/5