I love the shapes these double Etherees create, I like too the way you left a deliberate space before the last word.

Well done. X

Naomi ,

I love your double etheree. ..I love the message as well. .

well done N
.Gel

Panic attacks can bring out the worst before it calms you down and it makes us feel so silly and terrible when the others are there to witness it.

The only one thing I would like to say is that some comas along certain lines or after certain words would make this Etheree read smoothly. For now its like broken up sentences but I guess it also depicts the breaking up of a person when he/she has a panic attack.

A double etheree and a very good one.

To be honest, while I see Meena's view, it's one of those that, considering the subject matter, I believe works well as it is. The lack of punctuation adds to the frantic panic of the piece.

Anyway, it really is very good - Michael's workshop is already producing some great work, isn't it?

Take care, Naomi

This is excellent!!

Em

Contrary to what meena said, I think the lack of punctuation is important to this piece. It's a piece touching upon social embarrassment, a public panic attack that you're writing about in haste because of the pain it causes you to endure merely to recollect. I would suggest you go even further and take out all the period/ellipses between go and home, and lowercase home as well. I think it would be harder hitting. The spaces between the word makes the reader wonder what's special about home, and whether home was back to your house or apartment, or more ominous like suicide brought on by the embarrassment of the panic attack (irrational, but rationalizing is difficult during such periods of your body failing you).

Anyway, your word usage is magnificent and I was throroughly engrossed. Wonderful!

5/5
IdTakeABulletForYou

N, this is amazing! Double etheree to boot. I agree, I think punctuation would have thrown the whole vibe of this off. Well done-

Hey N,

Love this Double Etheree, i've written a few in my time and i've found that once they're are finished they're almost as rewarding to write as they are to read, word choice and all the blah blah's are spot on and a subject I think many can relate to.

Awesome write!