Saving Private

by Colm   Oct 24, 2013


I went to the coast where the sea mist
rolled over the dunes and made it so
there was nothing but ocean, sand,
marram grass and footprints in the world.
I could have been standing in a novel
or on the banks of an ocean I hadn't
yet tickled my toes in. The drizzle
and sea spray showered my hair as I ran
the dunes, back and up and down.
It surprised me to find you away from the home
of my mind, and your eyes and hair began
to seem oilier than before. Your freckles
bled watercolours and the cherry of your lips
caricatured itself. I hunched
and listened to the drumbeat of my breath
and watched longshore drift sweep seaweed
at my feet. I listened to the canon fire of my heart
and gave my footprints the company
of a sand angel.

4


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Latest Comments

  • 10 years ago

    by Britt

    Judging comments:

    I feel like I am reading a poem published over a hundred years ago, but a well established Irish poet. Colm has such an old soul, old-timey feel in his poetry, I know I've said it before and I'll continue to say it. His poetry brings such an amazing freshness to PnQ that can't go unnoticed. This poem is exactly that. It's so beautiful, with the images. I picture it to be an exact image of his homeland, and it's overwhelming. There is so many images jam-packed into this poem that you have to read it a few times to really bring it all home. I truly love this piece and hope to see it hit the front page!

  • 10 years ago

    by PorcelainMoon

    Do any of your poems not win awards? haha. Another inspiring write.

    -Dean

  • 10 years ago

    by Meena Krish

    Such an intense write Colm and your rich vocabulary makes this read so memorable with a touch of sadness of a soldier's memory. The images too just pop out and pulls the reader into this world of pain and loneliness..liked it!

    Congrats on the win!

  • 10 years ago

    by Redangelwings

    Colm. This poem spoke so many emotions to my heart this is unbelieveable. First of all the title really is a big eye catcher bdcause of the movie saving private Ryan. :). The imagery is such detailed that you make the reader feel like you are there. Wow oh wow. I love the soldiers view point as well. You can feel the ocean in between your toes. And I feel like you can see the nerves that he holds inside of himself. I think my favorite line is the one where you are not thinking about the person they love or a family member. It's completely different from what they think. The wording is immuclate and the flow and imagery is perfect. Definitely favourited. Well done!