Typical Evening, Late Night of Writing

by Maple Tree   May 26, 2016


After a long evening
of mental anguish,
helping a woman
be safe from
voices that taunt
her very own mind;

I end up alone
with my pen
and I write.

Night air is calm
with a hint of warm,
I smell salt,
from a slightly, sweaty
brow
of a sleeping
husband.

This cigarette is
a compass,
amazed
at how comfortable
my blanket
feels....

It's a wonder
I'm still awake.

I helped a man
understand that
urinating in a public
hallway is not appropriate,
while coaching a woman
to only eat three slices
of bread, rather
than the entire loaf.

I'm so tired,
but I will stop
writing once my cigarette
stops forming
smoke rings
and the moon
moves from
my window view.

9


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Latest Comments

  • 7 years ago

    by Darren

    Judges comment

    Maple tree has this way with her writing to draw you in and imagine being there right beside her. If I smoked I would be drawing on the cigarette with her. (trying to ensure I don't make the butt soggy before handing back)
    I like the layout, it is set out as a poem that should read quick, yet you can't help but read it slowly and enjoy every stanza.
    Almost a 10 but stanza 6 didn't quite work for me. Yes it tells you the back-story and explains why insomnia is hanging about like an unwelcome guest. It might be that I have never been a fan of sentences broken across two lines. (Public and hallway) Yes I am that picky.
    I don't want to detract from how good this is though. (on best behaviour this week)
    A final point I love how the slow pace and the peaceful setting of the poem is in conflict of the drama and tension of the story it is telling. (The job must be very stressful yet very rewarding) 7 points

  • 7 years ago

    by Abed

    <3 moving

  • 7 years ago

    by GB

    Congratulations, Andrea.
    like a movie, the different faces of life interpreted in very touching and simple words. Great read :)

  • 7 years ago

    by Em

    Congratulations on a well deserved win :)

  • 7 years ago

    by Mr. Darcy

    Congratulations Andrea, a fruitful late nights work.