Comments : Hunger

  • 9 years ago

    by katrina

    I really can relate to this in so many ways....I LOVE IT!! Keep it up and check out my poetry too pls...thanx

  • 9 years ago

    by EssenceOfLace

    This was very sweet. I do have a few suggestions.

    "To feel the rhythm,
    Of your heart.
    Be together,
    And not apart."

    For that stanza, I think you should add on the third line "To"
    so it would be

    "To feel the rhythm,
    Of your heart.
    To be together,
    And not apart."

    I think it helps the flow of that stanza.

    And one other suggestion

    "To be kept safe,
    All through the night.
    To hear you tell me
    We'll be alright."

    Maybe put quotation marks around the last line, because it is something someone said.

    Either way, this was a great poem. other than the first suggestion I made, the flow ran perfectly, which is good. It helped to make the poem sound more genuine, and heart-felt.
    =)

    5/5

  • 9 years ago

    by firexdancer

    Awww! This poem was so sweet and cute! I just kept smiling as I read it because it was so simple yet beautiful. I love poems like these, where the rhyme seems to come naturally and makes the reader happy to read it.
    I'm going to add this to my favorites now. lol.
    5/5
    ~gabriella

  • 9 years ago

    by karle

    AWW DIS POEM IS KILLEN MINE BY 100

  • 9 years ago

    by Love vs Fate

    I just wanted so say, love the poem...soooo much.....EMOTION! FANTACTICO! i love it. i give u 5/5!!

    keep it up!!

  • 9 years ago

    by Jessica

    Awhh this is awesome, love it.

  • 9 years ago

    by HillaryNicole

    Aww dats so sweet i feel da same way wit my lover

  • 9 years ago

    by xXxMzPuRpLe BaBiiExXx

    I LOVE DIS POEM ALOT!!!!

  • 9 years ago

    by WrittenInTheStars

    Flawless, yet again. The flow was spot on, and everything was perfect. Love it.