Barriers Between

by SiLeNtLy ScReAmInG   Mar 28, 2008


The heart grows heavy,
With tears I'm holding back,
Overwhelming, they spill out,
Strength is what I lack.

Remembering gets hard sometimes,
It hurts to make it through,
It's not easy to see and believe,
That all your words were true.

You always said it's what you needed,
Only asked I do my best to try,
I was to strive for happiness,
Because you said there'd be no need to cry.

You promised you'd always be here,
Staying right by my side,
Convinced me our bond could never be broken,
And when I needed, your arms would open wide.

But now that things have run their course,
It feels like you're so far away,
I open my mouth to try and talk to you,
But I'm not sure what I should say.

I love you and I miss you,
With all that's in my heart,
You were always a dear friend,
I thought nothing could keep us apart.

But this distance that's between us,
Makes things so hard to bare,
This line that we can't cross,
Keeps me here and you there.

Everything has gotten so messed up,
And my tears refuse to be dried,
My world's been hard to keep together,
Since the night that you died.

I just wish I could see you,
To know you're here watching over me,
To make us close again like we once were,
Rather than a distant faded memory.

1


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Latest Comments

  • 15 years ago

    by Jenni Marie

    "The heart grows heavy,
    With tears I'm holding back,
    Overwhelming, they spill out,
    Strength is what I lack"

    ^^What a beautiful opening! Oh dear lord, I really don't know what to say about this stanza, except it hits close to home, and I love the depth and emotion in these opening lines.

    "Remembering gets hard sometimes,
    It hurts to make it through,
    It's not easy to see and believe,
    That all your words were true.

    You always said it's what you needed,
    Only asked I do my best to try,
    I was to strive for happiness,
    Because you said there'd be no need to cry"

    ^^I think the last line would flow better with something like:
    Said there'd be no need to cry.

    I find these stanzas to be incredibly strong, it always hurts when you realize that someone has changed, that the words they said are no longer valued or meant and you do such a wonderful job at portraying that here.

    "You promised you'd always be here,
    Staying right by my side,
    Convinced me our bond could never be broken,
    And when I needed, your arms would open wide."

    ^^ I frikken adore the last line on this stanza, I find it to be one of the best lines of the piece.

    "But now that things have run their course,
    It feels like you're so far away,
    I open my mouth to try and talk to you,
    But I'm not sure what I should say"

    ^^ I found the flow on the last line to be of a little, maybe something like:
    But I'm not sure what to say

    Again, you have such a way with words, I love how you show that you're trying to communicate but you're not sure how to, again something many can relate to.

    "I love you and I miss you,
    With all that's in my heart,
    You were always a dear friend,
    I thought nothing could keep us apart."

    ^^ I don't think you need the "I" in the last line, it broke the flow for me. I'm not to sure on this stanza..it just seems weaker to me whereas the rest of the piece is incredibly strong.

    "But this distance that's between us,
    Makes things so hard to bare,
    This line that we can't cross,
    Keeps me here and you there"

    ^^ I didn't like the flow on the last line, it just didn't seem to go for me..but I'm out of ideas for this one so ignore me =D

    "Everything has gotten so messed up,
    And my tears refuse to be dried,
    My world's been hard to keep together,
    Since the night that you died.

    I just wish I could see you,
    To know you're here watching over me,
    To make us close again like we once were,
    Rather than a distant faded memory."

    ^^ Kris..you brought tears to my eyes..this is so sad, the melancholy and heartache in these stanzas is overwhelming and tears me up.

    I adore this.

  • 15 years ago

    by Forever Broken

    Wow! I can't believe I haven't commented this poem yet. It's simply amazing. You are so talented. great job, the flow was perfect for this type of poem. keep it up! 5/5
    ~Forever Broken~

  • 15 years ago

    by Sarah

    ''Rather than a distant faded memory.''

    Beautiful! simply beautiful !
    Well written and beautifully penned..Great Job, keep it up 5/5

  • 15 years ago

    by emiley

    Wow i like this poem! i can relate to it alot! you have a great gift! keep up the great job!!!

  • 15 years ago

    by desiring love

    Wow! I love the emotions this poems send shivers of just imagining such pain.

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