A Wicker Veil

by Quietly Versed   Mar 30, 2008


It's a catalytic repose
Of innocence and Dixie toes.
A jubilee, confederacy,
Rebellion I suppose.

Eleven stars
Denied their stripes,
Shameful deed, a freedman's act,
The Yankee's war is ripe.

Southern loam boast rebel blood,
While Lincoln plays them Dixie.
Emancipation, Proclamation
The south has been set freely.

Insurrection comes to end,
Ten percent of rebel fiend,
Reconstruction, Abolition,
Vote to end this bloody scene.

The Rebel folk,
The Yankee damned.
Harmony, Dissension,
A union divided,
Made whole once again.

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Latest Comments

  • 15 years ago

    by Quietly Versed

    You see H E Losey, while you may be published this poem proved to me that you lack the ability to pick out rhythm. I had you read this poem specifically because it won me several "Rhythm" contest and My college university. My Creative Writing teacher Who too is published with several books praised this poem for its strong rhythm and flow.

  • 15 years ago

    by H E Losey

    Again the story unfolds well in your words.

    The first stanzas a,a,b,a rhyme scheme is confusing when followed with three stanzas with an a,b,a,b scheme and a final stanza of a,b,c,d,c rhyme.
    As for metre/rhythm in the syllables the third and fourth stanzas seem to flow well, The other three stanzas I have trouble finding their rhythm

  • 15 years ago

    by Quietly Versed

    Well I appreciate the comment, but looking at the poem the only word that i can see i repeated was dixie. and i only repeated it once, and it was referring to two different things; one being the song dixie, an the other being the southern people.

  • 15 years ago

    by NyellMoonlight

    I like the choice of words a lot, but I personally dislike the repetition of the same words within a poem and you did that here few times. I don't understand the function of some repetitions, but that is just my opinion.
    All in all, I think that you did a great job with this poem. Whole message is portrayed nicely and the flow/rhythm of the whole poem seem flawless. Powerful, deep piece.
    Keep up!

  • I loved your poem. it is about history but yet it had a more modern feel to it. i really liked it. and i liked how the 3rd line to every stanza was to descriptive words. GOOD JOB!