Wow! I must say that you honestly impressed me with this poem. It is so provocative and I didn't read more powerful life-society poem in a long time. Each line is filled with great descriptions and your choice of words is very creative through whole poem.

I think that title is very good for this poem, it is unique and you made very strong bond between it and the piece without even using it in a poem.

- Tick, tick, tick, goes the tapping of fingertips;
As the 3PM bomb approaches sweet climax.
Bam! Brief satisfaction.
Releasing institutionalized drones off to the world.
Single file they march, silent, they reach their goal;
Paying tribute to the time card god. -

^You absolutely pulled me in this poem with first stanza, it is so deep and it still poses some simplicity. I like how you opened this piece, it is very innovate. Simply whole stanza is amazing.

- Regrouping at HOME base,
Forming average 4.5 families.
Self-absorbed husbands,
Buying lust off the interwebs.
Hideously picture perfect plastic wives,
Forced into pill popping frenzy, a cure for loneliness;
While their children are surviving,
Life lines attached to a virtual reality world.-

^Such brilliant and intense description. You expressed your message on truly interesting way, terrifying is the fact that this lines posses so many deep truths about the world and life.

-Viral syndrome: work, sleep, repeat;
Slowly depletes our creative potential.
Humanity failing, culture now lost.-

^Simply superbly written. This is great as the rest of the poem, I absolutely agree with the excellent message which you strongly described in this lines.

-SYSTEM ERROR!
World crashing; in 3, 2, 1... -

^Here you truly stunned me, so effective ending. You made amazing connection between it and beginning of this poem, it is truly provocative and it makes you to think for a while cause it is very real.

Whole piece is also excellent in punctuation sense.

Overall big kudos to you, I enjoyed so much in this poem and I will put this into my favorite poems, it also deserves contest nomination.

This poem is like no other I have read. I found it interesting, captivating, and a little unusual.

"Tick, tick, tick, goes the tapping of fingertips;
As the 3PM bomb approaches sweet climax.
Bam! Brief satisfaction.
Releasing institutionalized drones off to the world.
Single file they march, silent, they reach their goal;
Paying tribute to the time card god."

[This was the most unusual part of the poem. Very hard to figure out what it means. But that mystery is what makes it interesting. Everyone will see different visuals, and get different ideas from it, me- I just imagined an army of soldiers. Not sure if that is correct or not.]

"Regrouping at HOME base,
Forming average 4.5 families.
Self-absorbed husbands,
Buying lust off the interwebs.
Hideously picture perfect plastic wives,
Forced into pill popping frenzy, a cure for loneliness;
While their children are surviving,
Life lines attached to a virtual reality world."

[The only thing about this that I did not like was "home" being in caps. Usually caps is for some sort of dramatic effect, and I did not get that from this word. The rest of it, was fantastic. Describing the "picture perfect" family, but in reality, has horrid problems.]

"Viral syndrome: work, sleep, repeat;
Slowly depletes our creative potential.
Humanity failing, culture now lost."

[This was an okay stanza, not amazing like the one before it. To me it would sound better as

"Viral syndrome: work, sleep, repeat.
Slowly depleting from our creative potential.
Humanity failing, culture now lost."

Just a suggestion, your choice if you like it that way.]

"SYSTEM ERROR!
World crashing; in 3, 2, 1... "

[GAH. I loved the ending. You really do count down the "3, 2, 1". I can hear a beep for each number. Creative!]

For your first writing in a few months, it was pretty fantastic. I gave you my suggestions and thoughts.
I give the uniqueness a 5/5
=)

~Lace

WOW! I am truly amazed by this one. Your style is definately different but very effective. I love the descriptiveness and your choice of words is truly applaudable. 10/5 from my side.

How that was amazing, at first I didn't get it but when I read te last few lines I understood what you were saying, and the ending was classic! Fantastic work 5/5 hands down!

Oh and I voted this for the contest nominations as well, yepp its that good :)

Excellent! A great diss to society. I love it!

Delivers a bitter message and hits hard. I didn't understand the first stanza, but the rest was great.

Stanza 2:
"Self-absorbed husbands,
Buying lust off the interwebs."
-shakes head- The way your worded it was fantastic. Buying lust...
"Hideously picture perfect plastic wives,"
I was a little confused here; thought that it was the husbands who were picturing perfect plastic wives off the interwebs, but I reread it and got the picture. I'd try rewording it though.
"While their children are surviving,
Life lines attached to a virtual reality world."
So so true... What is the world coming to? Anyhow, I don't think 'reality' is really needed here, merely saying 'virtual world' would be enough to get the point across. But you're the poet who decided, and it doesn't really matetr one way or the other.

Stanza 3:
"Viral syndrome: work, sleep, repeat;"
Nicely done.
"Slowly depletes our creative potential."
I'd change 'creative' to a harsher word, one that hits harder. I can't think of one, though...

Lovely ending, though I think it'd be better if you change the semi-colon to a colon.

Very true,I liked it.
Good imagery.
5/5.

WWwWo0o0o0o0o0owWwW is all i can say.... i luv this poem it makes so much sense...its so true...the words u chose are a fantastic fit in the poem... its so realistic and so mysterious... i really really really like it i really enjoyed reading it please write more poems yoo are so good!!!!! well done