Swirling the blackness, provoking thought pools;
Contemplating how my life could have been;
If my precious childhood had been less cruel,
And not fixed to the bust of Satan's queen?
Deeply I inhale the coffee's bouquet,
Allowing it to trigger the darkness:
Memories of chicory and ashtrays,
And mothers words - such evil spitefulness,
"You useless, bastard runt....you disgust me!"
Everyday of my life this filth has churned,
Shaping and twisting my reality,
Until the hatred inside boiled and burned.
Blood stained hands strangle her profanity;
Glistening eyes spew dark insanity!
Note: This is my first attempt at a Sonnet :/
*Syllabel count corrected on lines 8 &12. Thanks RK*
This was absolutely an amazing write. It was full of emotions which really came through and shined in thie poem, the reader could just feel the emotions reading it. I like you attempted to do the sonnet here, it was a nice twist to the poem. New styles are always fun to work with, I'm sure. Very dark write though, and full of sadness as well. Word choice - really blew me away here. Every word just wow'd me. Definatly worth my vote for contest nominations. Great job, Mr. Darcy.. Keep it up! 5/5
Blew me away! Your words were flawless in creating this dark and haunted tone. The distrubing imagery you painted in my mind made me uneasy but I loved it because you made me feel something and thats what every great poet should do, make the reader feel an emotion. Im proud of you on your first sonnet because you wrote it flawlessly. Nothing left to say but you deserved to win. Well done. *5/5*