Throwing Stones at a Glass Moon

Shadows dance across the walls to the beat of my heart,
As I toss and turn, trying to block out the sound of the clock;
And my friends tell me this is the end, but it's only the start.
Crying on the bathroom floor, I swore I heard you knock,
But after careful reevaluation, I blamed it on the wind.
My mouth smells like the ashtray hidden under my bed,
And they say they're worried because my waist has thinned;
[But those words won't stop the screaming in my head.]
I woke up in a chair pulled up next to the phone,
Cursed at myself for falling asleep, I could have missed your call;
And I looked to the clock: another night spent alone.
I thought you had promised you'd be here to catch me when I fall?

Sympathetic eyes press under my skin, itching to the bone,
They're all thinking the same thing, but no one will speak,
There's too many words, and they could say it in the wrong tone;
Besides, it's just another excuse for me to use next week.

I block out the memories using the only device I've ever known,
And I know what you would say: that I'm just a child, I'm weak;
But that's just the thing you could never see: I've grown,
[How could you have known, when you always turn the other cheek?]
The smoke billows out of my lips, burning through my thoughts,
And there's a man in the next room waiting, but I can't look at him,
Because I know you'd be ashamed to know I'm living off tequila shots;
Preying off of the bedroom lights gone dim.

I'm throwing stones at a glass moon, breaking apart the memories,
And I'll shatter you to pieces before I ever look at you again,
You laughed in my face when I told you not to go over-seas,
Baby, I knew the war would take you; [...now I'll never see you again.]

-Jenna, Elphick
August 29, 2008