All I Have to Do is Dream

by SH3S fiNAllY H3R3 l0V3 U N3NA   Nov 9, 2008


You showed me wonderful things,
Things I will never forget.
I've always wondered if they were true,
But now I see they're not.

You made me believe you really cared,
Like I was the one for you.
I've shed those many tears for you,
And now I regret ever sheding just one.

Everyday I wonder how life would be without you,
But now I see how life really is.
It's more beautiful than I thought it would be,
All I have to do is dream about my perfect man.

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Latest Comments

  • 15 years ago

    by Teria

    The middle stanza wasn't too great. Messed up the flow and emotion of the poem quite a bit. The other two were pretty decent. The beginning was strong and the end was okay. I wouldn't say strong or good, but it was okay. How you can fix that? Just go over the middle stanza, reword it a bit and in the last stanza try to mix it up a little. They just need some work. If you absolutely can't find anything wrong with it, just PM me and I'll show you ways you can fix them. I try not to TELL people how to fix them, just give them ideas of what needs fixed.

  • 15 years ago

    by Brittany C

    "And now I regret ever shed those tears."
    maybe try
    "And now I regret ever sheding one."
    I liked it. That was the only thing I saw that you might fix. I gave it a 5/5

  • 15 years ago

    by Hollymariee

    You showed me wonderful things,
    Things I will never forget.
    I've always wondered if they were true,
    But now I see they're not.
    You have really good ideas .. But the words just don't impact the way they should . Try bigger ones , incorporate comparisons ..

    You made me believe you really cared,
    Like I was the one for you.
    I've shed those many tears for you,
    And now I regret ever shed those tears.
    Again with the repetition .. Try to avoid it .

    Everyday I wonder how life would be without you,
    But now I see how life really is.
    It's more beautiful than I thought it would be,
    All I have to do is dream about my perfect man.

    It could be better . I don't know .. It just seems like it's missing some thing . 4/5

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