'Mindless scribbles in a margin,
eyes vacant of hope.'

Is this to do with writing? Writing your feelings down because you have no hope? I like the imagery here, it's good, although it could be made slightly clearer.

'Fighting through pain,
succeeding, but failing miserably.'

I dont understand the contradiction in that last line there? You can succeed at failing but you cant succeed but fail?

'Digging into a deeper hole,
you pulled up my hand.
You helped me out,
sharpening my dull vision.'

This bit is the best bit in the poem, it was simple and to the point, and the use of 'sharpening' was good.

'Helping me through lies,
holding through the pain.
A mindless scribble has meaning,
hope for eternal bliss,
you found me. '

I take it this poem is about someone close, because it seems that you feel your words for hope have been granted, and I can relate to the line that mindless scribble has meaning. Everything we write, as poets has meanings, even if it's only to one person, the person that finds you.

Sometimes, the true friends are found in our worse times, krista and not our best times, it si when we are in our worse shit , that we need such friends ...

your poem is great ,if you jsut plit it a bit into stanza , adn not keep it in 1 block so the reader eyes wont escape it.

i hope that firend that found you , know how to keep you , and know how to keep holding that hand , becasue you are a great girl to be firend with
^_^

you have my vote
5/5

"Mindless scribbles in a margin,
eyes vacant of hope.
Fighting through pain,
succeeding, but failing miserably"

^^I really liked this opening, the depth and emotion within these lines are easily felt and pulls me into the piece.

"you pulled up my hand.
You helped me out,
sharpening my dull vision.
Helping me through lies,
holding through the pain."

^^I enjoyed how the opening lines were full of loss and despair but here there was possible hope, it made for a good affect on the overall piece.

"A mindless scribble has meaning,
hope for eternal bliss,
you found me. "

^^I really liked these closing lines, simple yet meaningful and brought a smile to my face.

Glasses help dull vision, lol. but honestly, this poem was good, 5/5

I really enjoyed the first line here. Most of my poems start out this way, so it really caught my attention. Reading from the first to the second line, the flow was a little off, but I love the way it kept on the subject.

I really love the second line as well. This was such a mature line for a younger writer. With just a few words, you managed to set up a huge background. This line reminded me of a shirt I had when I was a kid; the picture was a skull head. It reminded me of a normal head, but huge sunken in eyes.

In the 5 / 6 lines, i love the imagery, but I would suggest changing DIGGING into SINKING. DIGGING is a good word, but reminds me of someone actually performing work (like a little man with a shovel). I think that SINKING is a little better because you can sink without actually doing anything physically.

I didnt like the YOU PULLED UP MY HAND / YOU HELPED ME OUT lines. I thought they could be combined into the same line: You took my hand and pulled me out". Using YOU twice in a row kind of killed the flow for me.

A few lines dow, the HOLDING THROUGH THE PAIN did not make much sense to me. No one wants to HOLD onto pain, but rather push through it. Maybe try saying: "Guiding me through the lies; helping me through the pain".

Overall, I really liked the poem. I would add some blank lines between every other line to help seperate the stanzas. The first time I read it, I thought this would be a great choice for a Formed Poem, where the words are shaped inside the picture.

Great job!

This was incredible!!! you are definitely one of my favorite weriters in the whole world : ) 5/5 keep it up your doing great.

This was really good. i liked it a lot. that must be some friend :) i have a best friend like that. we've been there for eachother for 13 years. good job and keep writing!!! comment on any of mine please???

I love all of your poetry.
the ones i read anyways.
:))
this poem in by far my favorite though.
I dont know why, it just is.
dont stop writing, you have some real potential.

And it would be greatly appriciated if you could comment and rate one of my poems.
thanks love!

-jesss.
Btw:: Im putting you in my favorites ;)