Comments : Follow The Leader

  • 14 years ago

    by PygmyPuff

    Woah this is pretty good. I like how u turn it into a game, when its really something serious. The structure and rhyme scheme flow really nice.

    =]

  • 14 years ago

    by Steady Stereotype

    Love this. The flow is perfection, and I expecially love how you said Follow the leader, a great way to paint the picture in our minds and at the same time it's because you make it sound like just a game is it so sad. Because in reality it's something so serious, so painfully true and yet many think of it as something with no big consequence.

    "'Follow the leader' is the game she played
    Just go with the crowd it was easier that way"

    ^ I absolutely love this line. Very Well Done. 5/5

  • 14 years ago

    by Michael D Nalley

    I believe it is better to be true to yourself as this poem reflects

  • 14 years ago

    by lonelydreamer

    I love this poem, i really loved how u used the game 'Follow the leader' as a way to describe situations like this. Nicely done

  • 14 years ago

    by RobinAnn13

    O.O I am stunned into silence by your words. lol
    But seriously, this poem was amazing. I thought it was very, very emotional and also really relatable. That's what society wants, right? Our culture is practically based on the idea of 'follow the leader'.
    It seems a little rocky in the fourth stanza, third line, just because it's shorter than the rest of the lines.
    It only has 9 syllables while the line following has 12 and the two before have 11. In the last stanza the first 2 are short but they seem to go together, being one after the other.
    That's my only suggestion.
    This is going on my faves. 5/5

  • 14 years ago

    by No Need For A Name

    I'm not a big fan of the peom. I can't quite say what was unenjoyable, but maybe the way stanzas one and four were worded, they seemed wrong to me. Also, the idea doesn't seem as original to me as it could be.

    Peace and prosperity,

    (RKD)

  • 14 years ago

    by xXxemzxXx

    Hey i love this poem it is so realistic about problems a lot of people go through these days it also is worded perfectly i honestly cant find anything wrong with it i give it a 5 out of 5 excellent work keep it up!

  • 14 years ago

    by Lady Nik

    Really good poem. I felt so much when i read it. Very deep and emotinal. i like your style too. Keep it up. Shanik

  • 14 years ago

    by FlawlesslyTarnished

    Amazing piece. (: From the very beginning of the poem, I was hooked. I like the theme of the piece and I know that it's something everyone can relate too. The flow in the beginning was great. Towards the middle, it was up and down. And one other thing, I know that this is a rhymed piece, but I think your need to rhyme in the poem was what threw off the flow a bit, because you wanted to word things however you needed to make the lines rhyme, you know. But regardless, this was still an amazing write. 5/5

  • 14 years ago

    by XxXcrystalXcontagiousXxX

    5/5 thats was a really good poem

  • 14 years ago

    by sweet escape

    I love this poem
    i can taste the sorrow on my lips as i read it aloud.
    it scared me because i have felt that way. i still do most of the time. i only wish that you were not writing from experience.
    it was a great read. and i loved the flow although the rhyme was not always spot on and simple at times it was great.
    5/5

  • 14 years ago

    by Sumit Ojha

    Excellent work :D

    This is deep and sad but very meaningful. Beautiful imaginary. (5/5)

  • 14 years ago

    by Lonely Rider

    A wonderful attempt... depression is something which has eroded into our lifes ... very sad tale... I guess a lot of reders could be able to relate to it...

    but some things that caught my eye are -I found too much of She here.. may be you could try removing some of them... and maybe you could do away with filler words...
    well thats just my suggestion...

    overall a good write...

  • 14 years ago

    by Jad

    This was a work of art or should I say poetry. The way you used the game follow the leader was awesome and it seems like that is what the world does today. The emotion I believe was pretty good. I loved it. Keep up the good work.

  • 14 years ago

    by Lauren

    I really like this. I think you wrote it very well and worded it very well. It really applies to alot of people today. It has a great flow to it and all comes together well. It is very sad but I like it alot.