This poem would have remained incomplete without your contributions. All I can say is that the poem leaves a hugh impact on me as a reader. There are so many complex things that I got to learn by doing a collab with you. I wish to join you again in future.

Regards,
Bhavin

You both did a good job on described how hopeless one can feel at times. I really felt sad reading all the ways in which you cannot find happiness and joy.

Good job to the both of you!

Hugs,

5/5 Ingrid

Well done on the collab, cannot tell there were two writers. Sometimes happiness, joy do seem to be an impossible find to all of us but with luck we can eventually find them. Good job.

What a powerful collaboration the 2 of you. The 1st stanza pulls me right into the poem. I like the imaginary presented in the poem along with how you guys poured down your thoughts.I also like how you repeatedly used 'an impossible find' through out the stanza.It really work for me in this case. I was totally blown away with how you guys end it. The choice of words and how it was placed in the sentence was superb. Both your words just melts together into 1.

Excellent Job
5/5 from me

An impossible find - what an appropriate title for the chaos we live in.

I love the line, "hope being a treasure, difficult to rake, happiness an impossible find."

brilliantly done collab.

peace and hope
shobhana

"Wondering anxiously about the nature's law "
^ I don't think you need the "the" after the word "about".

"All that is traceable is fault and flaw "
^There's something wrong with the placement of the word "fault" here..I would rather use "false"..gives almost the same meaning :)

"Negativity all around cause eyes go blind "
^I think you need a "to" after the word "eyes".

"life does not seem the same "
^Wouldn't "sound" be better than "seem" ? I just thought while reading the words "seem the same" this was tiring for a read.

You did a good job you two here :) though you need to strengthen your vocab a little and try to use more metaphors.
a good read though :)

Write on~

Oh and by the way you have a grammatical mistake in this line:
"Negativity all around cause eyes go blind "
^Should be "causes".

I forgot to thank you for the sweet comments on my poems :)

Kelleyana
nice job on this collab.

Clouded by unpleasant memories that nag the brain
In the web of despair I get myself entwined
Making things complex, life does not seem the same
I guess a happy mind is an impossible find

Happiness seems to always be just out of reach. You can see it and sometimes almost feel it but then it slips away.
Good job!
(((Hugs)))
Cindy

This is surely one of the best collab read. I really loved the theme as that made me think again and again. Also it made me realize that i am not the only one having such thoughts.
Great write indeed.

Hope to find more from you both in coming days.

all the best and take care

"I guess a happy mind is an impossible find. "

^^ ... so true... how we are never satisfied with what we have...

"Negativity all around cause eyes go blind
Hope being a treasure, difficult to rake
Happiness seems to be an impossible find. "
^^
Happiness seems impossible find ... but then we should know how to be happy in all circumstances... very well penned...

I loved the flow of your write... rhythem and smooth...

Hello kel,thanks for the comments.glad you wrote some words about my work.
compliment ´back for your excellent poems.
i give you 5/5 for this poem about life,
nice expressions of words.

giegielove

A sad, but superb write Kellyana. So well written and expressed . It touched a chord. lSometimes we feel so hopeless and alone in the world.. and that we will never find joy. But I believe theres a rainbow out there for all of us.. and that it will appear when they clouds have passed away,

Thanku for a very touching write Kellyana.
Best wishes,
Olwin