King of Fools.

I thought it was a pretty great poem. Though i thought that the beginning of the poem to the second half was kind of choppy, like it didnt transition that well so it almost felt like reading two different poems. It seemed to flow well and the overall idea was really well thought out, great job. 5/5

Wow great poem,
it had an amazing flow,
and the way you described it was very impressive,
great readx

A brilliantly written poem. Intense powerful wording. It seems you were called upon to accept a challenge and did it with flying colors. Impressive

"Dubious first impressions were soon obliterated
as your eyes began to swallow fear and shoot out hope."
`I see your format here has extremely long lines; an obvious suggestion would be to break them up into smaller lines to produce a nice flow.. but other than that.. I was really impressed with your start here. Such great word choice. Loved how you said their eyes began to swallow fear and shoot out hope. I have never heard eyes swallowing fear before, or shooting out hope - great originality in your lines here.. awesome job.

"I honestly thought no one could shine the way you did,
your smile could cut through tension."
`I LOVED ' your smile could cut through tension' - cut has SO much meaning in this line, how STRONG their smile was and how it could cut through tension, gosh, I really loved this line. :]

"I had believed you would save us all
from the great depression that was brewing,
that you could cure my world
with just one glance."
`I can truly only praise this piece for its wonderful thoughts and the way it was written. I loved when you said to save us from the great depression, meaning the worst things in the world.. this person could save you from anything.. they held such a large amount of power to cure your world.

"We searched for a leader, an idol- to show us how to achieve
you fitted our desires, played with our hopes and dreams."
`This is like a perfect quote, It speaks a lot about life and the truth about how we all search for that one person in our life that is our 'idol' the one who helps us along in life and shows us how to achieve our goals, and make our dreams come true

"You drained all you could from him, left him to die;
Paralyzed, I was torn between two worlds."
`This was kind of a weird transition? I'm kind of lost now thinking youre talking about someone else. Anyways, regardless of that I thought your word chocie was awesome here yet again.

"You were the king of all fools, the trainer and the guide,
But I was the fool who willingly took your side
in hope of a better life."
`Quite a sad ending but sometimes in life this happens..

Well done - loved this, I can only praise it

5/5. Temps

"Dubious first impressions were soon obliterated
as your eyes began to swallow fear and shoot out hope."

I liked your word choice here, not cliche at all. I don't hear "dubious" and "obliterated" often, this was a catchy opening.

"I honestly thought no one could shine the way you did,
your smile could cut through tension.
I had believed you would save us all
from the great depression that was brewing,
that you could cure my world
with just one glance.
Thats all it took.
Naivete."

Not sure about that first line, maybe reword to this: "No one could ever glow like you did".

The next line I like how you used the word "cut", this line was unique and well-worded.

Next few lines were brilliant, your vocab is deep and powerful. But "Thats" should be "That's". Honestly, I didn't know what that last word meant so I had to look it up, but I liked how it was a different word, not a cliche.

"We searched for a leader, an idol- to show us how to achieve
you fitted our desires, played with our hopes and dreams."

Beautiful lines here, perfectly describing all that happened. I love that last bit, "played with our hopes and dreams", a fitting part.

"You drained all you could from him, left him to die;
Paralyzed, I was torn between two worlds."

Well-expressed emotions and feelings you are facing.

"A wreckage formed by your true colours
or the paradise you promised.
What a fool I had become.
Dazzled by a brighter life"

Such captivating lines here that hold the reader's attention the whole way. Nice job!

"where disaster was unknown.
Blinded."

I noticed you did this earlier, have that last line be one word all by itself, it adds a nice touch.

"You were the king of all fools, the trainer and the guide,
But I was the fool who willingly took your side
in hope of a better life."

A powerful ending that sums everything up. I quite enjoyed this write Missy, you portrayed such talent in this piece, as others. 5/5 from me, take care and God Bless You!

~MaryAnne