Comments : I'm Already Home

  • 14 years ago

    by Baby Rainbow

    Aww this is a lovely poem. it is very touching and flowed very well to fit the emotions of the poem. i think the repetion of the verse
    "If you're reading this, expect a knock on the door,
    looks like I only got a one way ticket out of here.
    I got weak in the knees, stumbled head over heals
    and closed my eyes for good, I was left without a choice."

    worked very well and reinforced the message in the poem.

    the last line in the second verse reads : "sweetheart whip away your tears and just remember this,
    if you're reading this, I'm already home. " i am not sure if this is a spelling mistake or if you meant it this way but i think perhaps it would be better if it read sweetheart wipe away your tears. just my thoughts.

    i really enjoyed reading this and was very moved by it, i can imagine it as a song that can be played at funerals etc.

    well done, 5/5 from me x

  • 14 years ago

    by Courageous Dreamer

    'sweetheart whip away your tears and just remember this,
    if you're reading this, I'm already home. '
    `Whip should be wipe.
    Loved the inspiration of this piece from If Youre Reading this by Tim McGraw..truly an amazing song.. it gives me chills everytime I hear it..

    Third stanza I loved the repetition!

    Loved the concept of this poem! Taking a original song and turning it into another song with pieces of that song but also adding your own words.

    Well done :]

  • 14 years ago

    by kevin Boundy AKA the ghost

    Wow would be the only word i could possibly use to describe how i felt about this poem. simply incredible emotion was put into this. amazing flow and great structure. keep up the fantastic work. 5/5

  • 14 years ago

    by Lauren

    Amazing job! This is an awesome poem. So very powerful and full of emotion and grief, yet optimism. It has a great flow and is worded very well. I love it!!

  • 13 years ago

    by AngelDust

    I thought I'd come and look at your work. I haven't in a long time. This is amazing and beautiful but so very sad. The words ''I'm already home'' hit me pretty hard. My grandmother will be gone a year 10th March and I never really thought of it that way. It's so hard to accept. This soke to me. I adore you're poems.

    Danika
    --xx--