Hanging by a Moment

by The Queen   Nov 13, 2009


I could feel the sudden
cascade of forcible darkness
so deep...beneath the ragged
cliff of friendship that, I could
hear the silent laments of two
broken hearts falling into the
marble ground of love and trust
At a blow, turned handicapped with an
"ABSENT FOREVER" admonition

These days, the inevitable
changes of the seasons and
the timeless wisdom of the
dying auld lang syne...bring
forth tears--to my absentminded
eyes, inconsolably

Emptiness lingers from the depth
of the night; and your memories are
like these evening stars--mysteriously
charming to look at and now remain
evermore a mystery

And like a fragmentary song
in need of proper tempo,
each word of this unrhymed poem
written between a few sobs and
involuntarily tears mutely screaming
for appreciation amid infinite pain and
unpromising love drifting off---into
another yet murderous silence...

(Hanging by a Moment - Lifehouse)

Copyright (C) 2009 by EvanescentMoon

0


Did You Like This Poem?

Latest Comments

  • 7 years ago

    by Michael D Nalley

    The rhythm and flow of this unrhymed poem is as amazing as it timeless theme

  • 7 years ago

    by Kenneth

    Lifehouse are the best. Hangin by a Moment my favourite song. Your poetry is good.

  • 8 years ago

    by Lady Nik

    I could feel the sudden
    cascade of forcible darkness
    so deep...beneath the ragged

    *I don't think you need the "so" before "deep" I think deep says it all. I do like that you said cascade, that's always a nice word lol*

    cliff of friendship that, I could

    *I think the comma creates a pause which then ruins the flow of the poem. I'd take it out. Flows much better without it.*

    At a blow, turned handicapped with an
    "ABSENT FOREVER" admonition

    *I love these last two lines. They have such lasting effect and really bring out a boldness in your emotions.*

    changes of the seasons and

    *I'd take out "and" that way the two lines flow into each other and add a deeper effect,*

    the timeless wisdom of the
    dying auld lang syne...bring

    *I love this part :) the diction is very interesting and creative. Really adds more to the saddens of the poem. Lovely*

    and your memories are
    like these evening stars

    *I can really relate to this part. It makes me sad almost in a way. The memories can be so bright and painful that all you can do is cry. Love that you put the part about the stars in. I love stars and I often remember the most when it's night*

    And like a fragmentary song

    *The word "franmentary" didn't flow right to me. I think "fragmented" sounds so much better and flows into the nest line nicely*

    each word of this unrhymed poem
    written between a few sobs and
    involuntarily tears mutely screaming

    *I loved this part. I often do that. I'll point out that the poem doesn't rhyme or that what I'm saying makes no sense. I think that's what makes the poem real to me. You broke that wall of the poetic world and let me into your world if that makes since. Anyways I really enjoyed this piece. I often fall in love with your poems :) and this is another great one. Congrats dear. Nik*

  • 8 years ago

    by Cindy

    Congrats on the win :)
    Take Care
    Cindy

  • 8 years ago

    by PinkyPrincess

    Beauuutifulll! I love it... So wonderfullly written... Congratulations on the win!!! :) You deserve it! I love how the inspiration came from 'Hanging by a moment' by Lifehouse. I love the song!