Everything you said this poem is heartbreaking, but at the same time it gives you the message that whatever is going to happen we have no control it. What we can control is our emotions after the damage is done.
I love that you end this poem on a positive note.
Apart from the heartbreaking subject of this poem, this piece overflows with your creativity. This is a bold declaration to make and is very strong of you. As a reader I feel sorry for your loss, but I am glad that you chose to regain life. This is such an impactful write.