Well I like the story's meaning and the flow of the poem. However I would work on using better description, your poem is full of too many unoriginal lines, such as "I feel so empty and cold" I would work on using different words to describe your meaning...don't be afraid to use more complex words, but be careful to not over use them so its a diatribe that no one understands. You want to capture your readers attention with orgininality they've never heard before, that's what makes a great work. Hopefully my critque wasn't too brash. Good poems, just tweak it up a little that's all.

Comment on my latest two please...thank you :)

It was described as a sad poem and a sad poem it was. Aching without loved ones is a terrible sight for anyone. Doubt always conquers positivity and you showed that ideal very clearly int this piece. Great job