Oh and what really is the point,
I mean to say we sit and we drink and we talk about the politics like we give a shit or know what we're talking about but in the end it's futile.
Because we are all ultimately fighting a losing battle and what is the point in maintaining the closeness in order to lose it sometime.
And when it comes it will be hard and cold like the air when you step out of a warm shower and realise that nothing's ok anymore.
We spend our lives building things to knock them down and three years later we come back and it could be a different world, but no matter what, there's something about the place that reminds you of the time before. It's so fu**king hard to let go and pretend we don't remember.
Because I know you see her face everywhere we go and I act like I don't notice the way you only half heartedly hold my hand sometimes and you pretend you don't realise I am way darker than I let on.
Well I lost some friends for you because we all have a limit to the amount of bonds we can maintain and to build new ones, we have to sacrifice the old and that's the transient nature of this life. Or at least the chemistry of it. Because all this scientific bullshit that had gone undiscovered for years and is probably best left that way, well who's to say it really means anything more than the paper it's written on.
And you could say that about me and this and the way I can't quite spell out your name because it makes this all about you. And it's not.
I never needed anyone before and I don't intend to start now. I learnt it's worthless and easier to act out life alone in one's head.
See if you can catch me now, because I'm floating above your bed in your dreams and we are nothing but vivid imagination; me and you.
We are not us. We are not what they want us to be.
And I am not prepared to hold on any longer.
Let's allow the cycle one more turn after we've closed the door.