As I told you before, I love love love this.

I do like how you mentioned to me the tornado in your area came to life kind of in this piece (paraphrasing lol). I can definitely see that and think this piece can be interpreted in many different ways, which to me makes great poetry.

The imagery here is my favorite thing about the piece - the apple "scoured" (love that word) by ants..I can just picture it laying there against a drain and a curb, defiled.

I'm loving the word copper as well, it's a brilliant usage for leaves. It conveyed a strong sense of where you are here.

I also like the repetition here. The second..stanza? (the three lines) were really good as well. I really like the word traipse and think it's a good poetic "movement" word, if that makes any sense. I love the feeling of everything that seems silly to others reminds you of this one person, and in turn it makes YOU feel insignificant. This poem had a lot of emotion and feeling, but like I said before I love the imagery the most.

Not one ounce of cliche here in my opinion. :)

Nominated :)

Temps, I love your style now :D

through dandelion freckled fields,
copper leaves skimming
pavements, wind chimes clattering,

Love these lines, from its subtle alliteration to its beautiful imagery, keep it up!

The imagery is absolutely beautiful ...
deep intense and amazing :)
I loved this write of yours :)

Reading this creates a sense of loneliness...been surrounded by many things that is noticed except for the person who is there by the side..touching write and well written!

The way you opened the poem was fine but the metaphors you used doesn't seem to compile the whole poem together.

You wanted to create the image of your heart uprooted yet somewhat connected to the person? So let's imagine the heart as a plant, and the person as the soil. - the metaphor now works. But is the plant really that significant for the soul? There are other plants out there, there are worms that play more significance...

But you never pushed towards metaphorical imagery here, you just maitained the lines as if to fill the whole puzzle of the poem but I don't find it as a finished product.

After the first stanza, the following lines don't see to speak much, you could formulate them better that would cohere more with your metaphor.

why would the speaker be bounded to by fields, leaves, wind chimes (which i found as an oddity, because it is a simulation of nature) - fields leaves are natural, if you want to include the wind, maybe the wind brushing those, leaves and fields.

rotted apple coured by ants also seemed like an all of a sudden line. Its a nice line that could symbolise something in the poem, but the key is to have it connected with its entirety.

Nice idea though. Good luck. :)

Wow this was awesome, my best of the three winners -- i liked the apple dragged by ants image :)

I love how this poem begins like you're talking about a person, but as it unfolds, your words show a different intention. Though at first it's confusing, the whole of the piece fits together like a puzzle pointing towards your meaning. I think this could be interpreted in many different ways, but I believe you're talking about a storm, yes? Perhaps a tornado?

I love how you said your heart was uprooted... the tragedy and images that simple line has (in context to the rest of the poem) is heartbreaking and lovely. I think it's the strongest line in the poem, because after I've read through the poem and understand it, that line shows more (I think) than anything else. It's a tiny hint of what's to come, without being obvious.

The combination of "uprooted" and "bounded" is interesting, though I think you could choose a better word than "bounded"... perhaps something that more directly contrasts "uprooted"? If not, maybe I'm going crazy, but shouldn't it be "bound" not "bounded"? Hmm. It tripped me up.

I like the imagery of "dandelion freckled fields" but I see it as a happy image, and it confuses me with the rest of the poem.
Also, I think "pavements" should be "pavement" because it's more isolated, a single image, where as "pavements" lacks an individual connection, and keeps me from fully enjoying the image. Does that make sense?

Other than all of that, I loved the description of the copper leaves (so many colors coming to mind... and the introduction of something metallic and therefore "industrial" to describe nature only adds to the unnerving quality), the line spacing was excellent, and the bits of alliteration you used were wonderful.

I don't think there's anything wrong with the variety of images you used, because it's the same, really, the chaos of destruction, all the images you see... you can't quite keep yourself from being overwhelmed by all there is to take in. At the same time, the intensity of everything can make you feel isolated and insignificant. The title being the last line was another great thing... it brought the piece full circle.

Lovely lovely lovely. Very powerful piece. I think it could use a few changes but even so, ya done good. :)

I love it

Well, I am finally getting around to your poetry. I have been busy but it looks like you haven't let you talent diminish any. This poem kept a strong central idea and I love the imagery you use to describe your surroundings. The emotions in this poem are sad and mostly isolated and one can feel the intensity of your lines.

I didn't have one solitary line that I thought was really good but I thought the whole poem had a good connection. It flowed from line to line with ease. It also appears you use your lovely metahpors again which breathe life into the poem and help it along with all of the elements of a poem.

All in all, you did a good job with this poem and I can easily tell that you were being mature in your write and also deep in your meaning. I hope you continue to write poems like this and that they get better and deeper as times moves on. Great job and keep writing!

Congratulations on the Win. :]

Lovely and witty. Well fashioned words with pictures well painted. Good poem!

Leaving my heart uprooted
yet I still feel bounded to you -
great lines.

Is "bounded" supposed to be "bound", unless you meant "bonded"

great imagery. 5/5

Hats off 5/5 hv no wrds great job

I like your poem and the emotion in it and I like that you used metaphors to glide through it

The words seem to just roll off my tounge as if i wrote them myself, it brings to light a feeling i have tried to forget and yet i love feeling it now having read it formed so perfectly... and now you have me being poetic w/out meaning lol only the best ever do :P

I love the imagery invoked in this poem. I didn't just feel, I saw. Well done.

Bravo, truly excellent imagery and word choice from the very start through to the end.

Smooth flow throughout.

A nice read.

My favorite poem on here so far. 5/5

Wonderful write! 5/5

The first two lines!
No better start

You stripped me of my identity,
leaving my heart uprooted

And the last two lines!
No better finish

all I see reminds me
of you;
I'm insignificant.

So beautiful,so real

Liked! 5/5 for U!