A robin sits on a frosty white window ledge
a boy is sliding down a hill on a shiny new sledge
As a fat man in a red and white suit falls down the chimney
picking himself up with a ho ho ho!
He places gifts wrapped in pretty paper and finished with colourful ribbons and bow
With a look of glee the fat man in red and white knows its time to flee
Its 6 am as little Tommy creeps down the stairs
manoeuvring forward past mince pie and milk remains to the fire
place so warm a spark of joy followed by a smile across his face as
little Tommy finds his reward for being good.
I love the imagery in this piece. It is amazing and the style is nice. The flow really doesnt exist. The rhyme scheme is spotty, but I think it would be fabulous if you kept it up the whole way through. Though I did enjoy the piece and the theme, just those technical things caught my eye. Great piece, though I do believe a 3 is the best I can rate it...