Your poem touch me deeply, and that is for me the best symbol of a good poem sad og happy.
I am pleased when you emphrase, you are not god...
5 years ago
It's so difficult to forgive and this poems shows it. You are not god and thus you won't forgive as easily as he does because that word is not found in your dictionary. I like that part the most. That is not found in a western dictionary. The point is clear and the flow smooth.
Wow I really liked this poem! and I loved the last two lines , it ended this deep pouring of emotions on why you cant forgive and i love the reference to the hurricane in this poem, like their mistake make your whole world shift and I totally get that....
Chelsey, don't bother caring about those people who ask for forgiveness every now and then, giving no damn about your feelings or about their awful sins. They deserve your resentment, that is if you have the heart to hate someone, I believe you're too kind to. <3 This poem meant to me, because so many times have I been in this area where I can't forgive nor forget. Nobody is perfect. We are not angels, we are humans, that's what we were made for, to have feelings, whether they be grudge, love or indifference! It's all so normal, don't feel bad about yourself for having emotions inside. No, on the contrary, be proud of them, for we, and with 'we' I mean SO many people, might envy you for having such a sensitive heart! :)
Now enough babbling about humans psychical constitution, haha. I found so many thoughtful images in this write, I can't even figure out how or where to begin...your title made me so curious and although I intended to read some stuff by you, I was even more interested by the title. But when I read the poem, I disagreed, LOL. You might not be 'god' maybe a goddess, haha. :P Seriously, when someone begins their poem with the 'if' clause, I feel so tempted! I love to think about things and with your first sentence I did think of beautiful, sad things that got me to cry, Chelsey. I felt that softness, that soft forgiveness but at the same time your inability to forgive this person, it's like...the hurt is still newlyborn and your pride is not allowing you to let go of it...it's just a wonderful way to say how vulnerable you are, or anyone can be. Loved the use of 'ounce' there as well. It felt, at least to me, that this person is not really feeling guilty, but nevertheless, you would be ready to 'rinse' their guilt and conviction off their heart and mind if only you were able to, this left so much for my brain to think of. I truly relate to your words.
'and for me, forgiveness is just a mere word
in websters dictionary'
It would be very fitting if you added a full stop or two at the end. How you used 'mere' in here is just smart. It's kind of belittling your feeling towards forgiveness. I just love this.
I, however, disliked the 'to' as it's repeated (in the next line). I would use anything to avoid it. Like...maybe 'asking me to wipe, etc'? I don't know... I LOVED the image about the hurricane being taken out and put in an ocean without harming anyone. I so loved it. It symbolizes impossibility and I love impossibility put between the words, and the most interesting is that it was unepected. This poem felt to me more realistic than imaginary but with you using metaphors, it made it even more appealing. Kudos. I can't lie and say that I liked the usage of 'undoable' in the ending. It didn't feel poetic to me. Didn't feel like everything else in your poem, y'know! I think in the stanza before you explained that it's undoable, so why repeating the same idea and saying that it's undoable? Maybe you wanted to confirm the fact that it's impossible for you to forgive this person but again, it didn't feel necessary, rather a filler. I don't know, just what I felt. I, to be honest, really fell for the last two lines. They amazed me, literally, Chels. I just can't imagine how a girl who always throws confetti and popcorn on us in the club can feel sensitive in this deep heartbreaking way, haha. I just think happiness fits for you so much, never knew I'd be saddened this much by your words, which is a freakin' awesome thing!