Comments : Colours..

  • 11 years ago

    by Akerele1 Segun22

    Great piece,powerful comrade.

  • 11 years ago

    by Khalid M Darwish

    Awesome piece! I like it.

  • 11 years ago

    by DeviousCharmer

    Great description :)

  • 11 years ago

    by Baby Rainbow

    Bright coloured suntree,

    - sun tree is 2 words.

    Planted in our heart.
    Smiles, laughter. Fun for all,
    Only at the start.
    Happiness, sunshine.
    Holding on to tight.

    - in this line I am confused, do you mean too tight? or maybe so tight?

    So many happy notions,
    Un-prepared for any fight.
    Holidays, midnight breaks,
    Goodnight, godbless sleep tight.

    - God bless is 2 seperate words.

    Hello good morning happy days,
    Everything felt so right.
    Fairy wings, glittered shoes,
    Many poinent dreams.

    - I think you mean poignant?

    Tears, photos memories.
    All breaking at the seams.
    Meetings, phone calls angry faces,
    All because of us.
    What we wanted felt so right,
    Why kick up such a fuss.
    Bags of clothes placed in a row.
    Dreams shattered on the floor.
    Broken hearts. With missing beats,
    Fell from the open door.
    Silent tears, empty words,
    Questions un-explained.
    Photo's, broken memories,

    - photos doesn't need an apostrophe.

    All framed up with pain.
    Crying out for one more chance.
    That's not to much to ask.
    Every colour turns to black.
    Sun trees can't grow in the dark..</3

    This is another very touching piece, I loved the use of the sun tree's. Even the word sun and dark in the same context is very contrasting because it shold be bright and happy and what you describe is the loss and sadness which reflects no colour for you.

    Well done.