Comments : Problem Without Soultion

  • 11 years ago

    by Jenni

    Due to the fact that there is no punctuation whatsoever I found myself reading this poem of yours qith a kind of quick pace, which felt too energetic too me and didn't really display the mood of the poem well. That is why I would recommend you to add some punctuation. I think that you really had to get this out and I can literally feel the urge you had to share this because being in that situations causes quite some frustration, but I believe after all that you will find a solution and will eventually get out of it again.
    Chin up

  • 11 years ago

    by Dagmar Wilson

    Often we find ourselves in situation
    that can cause a lot of confusion and
    frustration. There is a solution to every problem. Well done 5/5

  • 11 years ago

    by Lioness

    Problem without a solution. Man this title alone can relate to so many people. Even without reading the rest of the poem I know that this is something I can relate to.

    I loved the rhyming of this poem. I think you are so good at that because it comes so natural and easy (at least I read it that way)

    I loved the write hun. So many of my current problems are without a solution at the moment.

    x

  • No remedy
    No cure
    Problem without soultion

    ^^
    'soultion' should be 'solution I believe (also in the title)

    An all time low
    No way to seek absolution

    ^^
    Great flow here, and also deep emotion said in such few words. Well done!

    In too deep to be saved
    Past the point of return
    Waters dried up
    It's time to burn

    ^^
    Once again, good flow. Easy imagery here.

    This is the hell we created
    At the depths of our despair
    A limbo in which to linger
    And neither of us have the love to care

    ^^
    Great flow until the last line - I think it may be slightly too long. Don't know how to fix this though and not that big a deal - because the content is WOW! That last stanza is by far my favourite! (:
    _________________________________
    OVERALL;
    *Reasonable flow.
    *Great sense of rhyme
    *Some imagery here and there, but vivid
    *Simple words
    *Great emotion
    *Deep content

    Well done! 5/5