Past Life

I adore this write.

I remember this from a contest. I sometimes really wonder why it always takes you so long to submit a piece you've written for a contest, seriously Nor. -.- Or maybe you've just been changing too many little details, details I've forgotten about because (duh) it's been such a long time! Maybe it's the title you were struggling with? It's sweet but ... a bit obvious. Curse titles, I bet you and I would both wish they'd never exist. =p

You start off this poem rather bluntly. A quote, a list of objects. I guess looking at these objects separately, they do possess their own beauty. The kind of beauty you'd find in a passionate artist, or a passionate lover. I like the way these objects stand on its own, yet create one "thought". I am rather stuck with criticizing this part of your poem, because I rather enjoy its straightforwardness, like recalling whatever that pops up in your mind in that split second. But at the same time I find myself hungering for the small details. Trying to find that snapshot of an "emotion".

"and sunrise reflecting
upon golden anklets."
^ Enjoyed that, especially because you're not saying something like "the sun" or "sunshine/sunlight" reflecting on the golden anklets. It's an uplifting image, it's moving, and it says more to me than the previous, motionless images.

"But then your gaze
would meet mine
Music would die,
Skies would storm"
^ A bit sappy for my taste, but I guess it's needed to realize the moment when everything around you stands still, turns around, and then moves on.

"A glass would shutter
soundlessly
upon marble floors
and heels
would click hurriedly
after mine"
^ I like this a lot. It contains the drama of a movie. Very "in medias res" and dynamic, so to say. It kind of reminds me of Cinderella, as much as you hate those princesses.

And after that stanza, I think I was surprised. Never really saw something so realistic and spontaneous in your poetry. The images are usually dreamy or abstract. The small dialogue here is something new.

The last sentence made it all for me. The irony, when you tie that sentence to your very first stanza, is enjoyable. Well done.