Comments : Many More To Come

  • 11 years ago

    by Xanthe

    Beautifully expressed emotions here, Alisha. Rhyming usually takes away emotion and adds a certain beat. Perhaps it is because of the topic? You are lamenting.

    This reminds me of a poem I wrote about the death of one of my cats. Aha, I like this.

    Perhaps my only critique would be the punctuation. And the capitalisation of letters on each beginning stanza. I would only capitalise after full stops or when it really is necessary otherwise, it is kind of distracting.

    "I've prayed to you every year"
    To: for ?

    Good piece. Keep it up.

  • Thank you so much for your critique.

    Definitely lamenting.

    He was my first (and longest living) childhood pet; he remains forever in my heart.

    I will review the punctuation shortly... I tend to over-use it in all forms of writing - poetry being no exception for me.

    I thought about using 'for' also, but it's definitely 'to' - I feel like if I had used 'for' it would imply that he was still alive, but fighting for his life I think. My prayers are definitely 'to' him as though a conversation is being had. Strange I know, but the way I feel.

  • 11 years ago

    by average thoughts

    A nice 3 stanza poem for uor dog..
    i nvr had pet..so cant relate d emotions, bt words r so gud to hear.

  • 11 years ago

    by Baby Rainbow

    This is so touching, a beautiful tribute to a best friend who will never be gone nor forgotten.

    Great work.