Comments : SAD

  • 11 years ago

    by Marvellous

    Where offense is found, Love is bound. What repels, is not meant to be.

  • 11 years ago

    by Tushar Das

    Good work.... Its heart touching... I guess you are also a broken hearted

    • 11 years ago

      by jodyann mcintosh

      Yes i have been, i wrote this a year ago after my boyfriend decided he wanted to be single.

  • You have expressed your emotions well.

    Favourite line;
    'silly girl and her fairytale love...'

    ^^ We tend to dream about love based on fiction rather than reality, and it only disappoints us in the end.

    Critiques;
    In the last stanza; second line
    'turn' should be 'turned'

    I think that the capitalisation of the poem makes it a little disorienting to read. Capitalising words should offer them power or anger but by using it for the entire piece, it has diminished that power.

    A really good write.

    • 11 years ago

      by jodyann mcintosh

      I just saw the mistake, i write so fast I sometimes forget to capitalize my work and thus the simple mistakes. I will do better next time :)