Silver and gold, may buy the world..but Life and Love, is with our God.
5 years ago
I have read the first part yesterday, this too but I didn't get the chance to comment until now. So.. I think this poem is beautiful and I will try to give you a better comment this time :)
As I have told you, the title, I found - intriguing indeed.
The rhymes flowed really well and I don't think they were forced, giving the poem a certain beat. I see you've stated that it is a song and I could just hear this being sung with a sad melody.
You started this by counting riches - material or earthly things, to be exact. They are usually where people these days obtain happiness, but happiness that which are temporary. That is shown afterwards when it states that they mean nothing without her by your side. I like the obscurity you add with using just the pronoun her. You give the reader a point to ponder upon.
"Love can't be bought, but you don't ever
unless you have the empty pockets of a rich man."
^ Oh my.. These lines literally made the poem for me. It has a hint of sadness but it is relevant in terms of the whole context.
First stanza: The rich man may be finally seeing that none of it matters unless he has her... that the true 'wealth' in life is LOVE.
Second: Again, even the finest things in life... gold, fine dining, clothes, etc... is nothing. Just objects... they can't make him feel anything the way she does.
Third: I love this stanza, it's amazing. It has so many meanings behind it. I agree with Saffie (Baby Rainbow) ... from the canvas as white as bone... I think it represents a home, but without her... it doesn't feel like it's home anymore... just a blank empty space filled with lots of 'stuff'.
Fourth: Love most definitely cannot be bought. It is felt with the heart and it sure doesn't have a debit card slot, lol.
I love this...well, I love both of the pieces... like I said just a fantastic message.
Love love love this one! I adore the ending here, the message is so strong and clear and the impact really hits you because you can be as rich as you can be with money but if you have nothing else you are never truly rich. This made me think of so much reading this, it is quite surprising what thoughts it stirred. The one thought I got was from the caravan not being finished and being as white as bone, this made me think of being able to afford a home but then having no money to decorate inside it, so therefor is it really home at all ? If it is empty inside? Then also if it was filled inside with all the riches, but you had not one person to share it with or even visit it, is that really home?
Wow, so much thoughts after reading this one, it is defiantely a thought provoking piece.