Life is a harsh reality. Dreams only make it worse because we dream of a reality we don't have. Life is a scale of the lost and the gained. Right now, your lost side is much heavier but that leaves much more room for your gaining side to be filled. You have gained the love and trust of many people who would hate to see you say goodbye to this ill-fated world. Give time a chance to heal the wounds it has caused.
And about the poem, I think it is amazing. Love it.

Man this made my head spin, and my veins feel like there was something flaring inside of them, dude I am here for you and YOU WILL NEVER LOSE ME!! I promise you that with my whole heart! great job with this poem, fabulous work at expressing your emotions!!