Conversation With God

by Brittany Ottmo   Oct 22, 2013


7-31-2013

I asked myself today
Why do I get the blame
What have I done to deserve this
And eyes full of shame.

I wanted to know the difference
Between wrong and right
But a shadow always appears
And turns off the light.

Right now as I sit
In a chair so alone
I cant help but look back
And notice Him, The Unknown.

I did not get up
I did not offer Him a seat
I was just so angry
For Him, I did not want to meet.

He knew I was upset
And put on a small grin
He pulled up a chair
And sank right in.

"Tell me, young lady
Why do you sit and cry
When all you have to do is look up
And stare at the night sky?"

No, I will not answer Him
For all He does is put me through hell
How do I even start
When my mind is nothing but a wishing well.

We sat there for a moment
And He smiled once again
"Tell me what ails you
So that we may begin."

Finally I looked back at Him
And told Him my pain
"I do nothing right
And I fall more than I gain.

"I want to let go
And let everything fall apart
I'm so torn
Between my head and my heart.

"For a long time now I have been happy
And moved on from the scars of my past
But yet today is different
Everything was just unmasked."

As I held my head so low
He picked up my chin
A tear rolled down my face
As cold as its ever been.

"Hush now child
You are not alone
I am in hearing distance
Just pick up the phone.

"I know you hurt
And it may seem things are hard
But you, my girl
Are my wild card.

"I have a special place for you
In time, you will see
I am never hurting you
I'm teaching you everything you can be."

I turned my head
And looked into His eyes
They speak so much truth
But I still believe they are all lies.

"If I am so special
As you claim I will be
Why put me through Hell
And not set me free?"

He started to smile
And then laughed at what I had said
"Brittany, dear, these are the lessons
That you need to keep in your head."

"I am putting you through tests
Because you are the strongest one of all
You are the leader
That has to learn to fall.

"But making you fall
Is not the goal I have in mind
I want you to pick yourself back up
and leave everything else behind.

"You are my soldier
You shall receive the greatest of gifts
Fly higher than any man
And soar far above cliffs.

"So dear, please understand
I am doing this for your own protection
Prove to the world you are great
And show them your redemption."

*~BrittBratt~*

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Latest Comments

  • 2 years ago

    by La Reina De Corazones

    I laughed at the part when you wrote if you need me pick up the phone, God I'm sure would have hell of a time with all the messages he would get on his phone either by texting or voicemails saying "where the heck are you"

    Favorite stanzas are below I found them beautiful and this should be in life under motivation if they have that option.

    "I am putting you through tests
    Because you are the strongest one of all
    You are the leader
    That has to learn to fall.

    "But making you fall
    Is not the goal I have in mind
    I want you to pick yourself back up
    and leave everything else behind.

    "You are my soldier
    You shall receive the greatest of gifts
    Fly higher than any man
    And soar far above cliffs.

    "So dear, please understand
    I am doing this for your own protection
    Prove to the world you are great
    And show them your redemption."

  • 4 years ago

    by Burning Angel

    This made me speechless! I love this poem

  • 4 years ago

    by HeightenedAwareness

    I forgot to vote sorry:)

  • 4 years ago

    by HeightenedAwareness

    Alot of what you have written here reigns true it does feel like we must be put through test after test and god knows our hearts but he must test us to see who will follow his will I don't believe nesessarily that we
    should think of ourselves I believe he is looking to find those who are selfless and help others even if we fall again and again those who are true will always help others those who struggle know others struggle those
    who are sad want to comfort others those who care will show they care and those who don't are of the world we give to others selflessly we ask for nothing in return I believe it touches our souls to help in any way we can.. I think I lost my heart today the kindness screamed at me for being mean, there was a lady
    shaking homeless now I saw grief I saw pain she needed a fix I gave one look at her and knew even saying I ain't giving you no money so you can do drugs that would of never crossed my mind but it did and I drove away, then the spirit of God came over me he tolde to go back and buy her some food then and pray with her , well I did go back and she was not there.. I have to say, even as I thought the devil had told her to leave I was comming back because I believed truly God wanted me to pray for her with her and buy her some food.. These are the words that hit my heart before going back.. Jesus never saw the person he saw their hearts and the pain within their struggles don't look on the outside.. Then I thought
    about if a demon would enter me and the Holy spirit comforted me and I knew he would be with me.. I looked for her and the man that was asking to help his church said she's right behind me we both looked for she and he said scratching his head she was right there now I wonder was it a test an angel this I will always wonder because she was no where in site , just disappeared.. Beautiful poem..

  • 4 years ago

    by Debbie

    Beautiful poem!