Everyone laughs at me
for drawing a rose on your nose
with your parents right behind me.
They call me crazy
for writing poetry on your arms
in my dreams. No one believes
that I'll ever make it anywhere
if I am impulsive
and my work
But your chest
is perfect for whipped cream
portraits and your tongue is
the most comforting pen
I've ever known.
They call me crazy.
No one believes
that I'll ever make it.
So just you watch
with love on my side
and ink in my veins
The first stanza I don't know whether to laugh or go "awe" because it's sweet, innocent, and so outrageous! I love how you wove a story into a stanza lol God you're really good at making a story into a poem and I can't stop myself from loving myself it (not that I wouldn't), and this stanza is so well written that I can literally see it working inside my head. I think the last part of the introductory stanza many people are told that but it's our dession to do as that is crudly told and quite possibly a lie or you can do better for yourself.
Second stanza is opposite of the first one, this one while sweet isn't as innocent. This part makes me think of late nights, just cuddling in bed and doing that or playingi around and suddenly it becomes a love scene. Personally I don't like being touched so this was quite a strong image in my head. Still beautiful though, and that's what matters.
Third stanza is the opinions of others and while negative, it makes the reader want the character to overcome those lies (I do) instead of giving in to that since I have gone through that and I've overcomed it by being in a school that's perfect for me and my parents are proud from being the pathetic girl I was once.
Fourth stanza, love the engergy the main character is giving off! I love how you ended it too, wish you could put the "I can do anything." together back to the last stanza because it would've been the same effect:strong ending. I loved, ;loved the strong emotion and the way you basically told them to get lost, because that's who you are and you will meet fate and mold it into what you want and make it happen!
Overall, the poem flowed quite nicely, the story and morality of this poem is stunning, the emotions knitted into it was spectacular, and I enjoyed reading it, so thank you for making it. 5/5
What a great attitude to write with, I really love it. It is infectious and I can feel that real strong will power to be what you want to be and go where you want to go. Even though other people think you will never make it, you will not let them beat you.