Sunset

by Adam Murphy   Feb 14, 2015


Words of fire fill the air
Old friends exchanging glares

Venom spews from both their lips
Love just isnt fair

She wasnt meant to be with him
He didnt seem to care

He wanted her all to himself
She wanted to be shared

The fight surfaced with the sun
Now its began to set

His words reach out as he asks
"Lets watch it and forget?"

They gaze upon the stars all night
A darkened silhouette

Begin anew with the sun rise
As lovers who just met

What they have indeed is rare
It scares him to the core

As long as the suns still there
He will always try once more

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Latest Comments

  • 7 years ago

    by Em

    Adam,

    This is a really well thought out piece that grabs my attention because of the short, sharp couplets. The rhyme and flow fit like a glove too.

    Em

  • 8 years ago

    by Mr. Darcy

    Hi Adam,

    I like the setting the couplets spread out. This makes this reader take each one and process it at a relaxed speed.

    The rhyme throughout is not imposing, rather scattered to bring home certain points.

    The imagery is clear and paints this moonlit couple as a silhouette, but cleverly, the sun is the metaphor for hope.

    Well done,

    Michael

  • 9 years ago

    by gumshuda

    Indeed awesome :)

  • 9 years ago

    by Mello193

    This was awesome. great read

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