Comments : Lamp

  • 8 years ago

    by Mr. Darcy

    Hello,

    This works on more than one level. In its most literal sense it is a walk in the dark. Perhaps downstairs into a cellar/office? Feeling your way in the dark would bring buried fears of the dark to the surface. Pushing these fears to one side the lamp is reached and the fears disappear with a click. I see the illumination as a screen being switched on to reveal a familiar face.

    On a deeper, more symbolic level though I see an emotional retreat into a dark self where confidence is almost childlike. The Alice in Wonderland reference makes the introduction of this piece playful and helps this reader relate on that level.

    However, the next line the feeling grows sinister in texture with the 'thicker air' and then the absence of it. I really like the speed you take playful to near death. This creates a shock factor that is rich in imagery.

    The next line draws a line beneath this fear with a reality check. Who am I? A person who has mixed feelings about their situation, but etched with excitement too about decisions that are controllable.

    Using a whole line to express one word: 'Click' proves how symbolic it is. The decision to act or not is made. The choice to move forward and out of darkness or to stagnate in a state of flux, or even retreat further to the 'thick' absent air.

    This one word click is like opening a door to a life instead of leaving it closed to its opposite.

    Finally, Alice makes the sensible choice and is rewarded with what her child needs most: Nurture of her soul.

    An excellent piece indeed.

    Well done,

    Michael

  • 8 years ago

    by Meena Krish

    JUDGING COMMENT:

    I feel this is more of a psychological write-like a
    self discovery of oneself. Coming out into the open
    or into a lighted world after been trapped within
    a darkness called war within oneself. We are our
    own enemies and it's the same "we" that make
    misery and life cold.

    The opening lines:

    Down. Down. Down. Down the rabbit hole,
    I go, downward, deeper, and it's dwindling

    ^^It got me thinking about Alice in Wonderland and
    in a way that too is a journey where Alice discovers
    her inner strength to battle the outside world.

    The title Lamp is very fitting here too. For it is
    this very light that brings brightness to the world,
    to the blind helping us on the road of discovery.
    A nice read.