Comments : Truce

  • 1 year ago

    by Yakari Gabriel

    If this doesn't win next week

    ISWUURTOGAWD...

  • 1 year ago

    by Kakera

    Stay strong hun. I pray that my brothers and sisters in Syria will know peace and safety again, and I'm very proud that I have come to meet many beautiful souls when I've volunteered with aiding the refugees that come to my country. I live in the port town where everyone from Germany comes to Sweden, and when the first wave of refugees came here and to Malmö from Denmark, I was so proud to see my countrymen truly embracing solidarity.

    Because all that most people want is peace, love, and security. I hope the war ends soon.

  • 1 year ago

    by Poet on the Piano

    My heart goes out to you so much in this <3 The raw emotion, the hurt as you reach out... just wow.

  • 1 year ago

    by silvershoes

    I agree with Yaki. I want to see this on the front page. It's incredibly moving and important.

    (I think "clinge" should not have the 'e')

  • 1 year ago

    by Boy

    Wonderful poem. its amazing. keep it up.. good work.

  • 1 year ago

    by Randall

    I believe this is a very good poem; strong, emotional, personal. There is a few slips and misses here and there, but nothing too important, for example: the ending for me is a tricky aspect of this poem, because it is hauntingly personal and the way it sort of collapses is very intriguing. But, on a personal note, I am not always such a fan of these kinds of endings. It worked this time, but only barely.

    Keep up the good work! A 5 from me :)

  • 1 year ago

    by Em

    So much emotion wow :( xx

  • 1 year ago

    by Darren

    Awesome, yet very sad, then awesome again

    awesome wins.

    nominated

  • 1 year ago

    by Michael D Nalley

    This needs to be on the front page for sure

  • 1 year ago

    by Abed

    You killed me by the end.
    I, too, want to see it on the front page. ALONE.

  • 1 year ago

    by Ben Pickard

    Hello

    I've been meaning to comment on this piece of beautiful poetry for a while now.

    Firstly, let me just start by saying as I have done before: this really is one of the most genuine and moving writes I have had the pleasure of coming across on this site yet.
    I could delve into the content, but I won't too much as it speaks for itself and is obviously highly personal; I don't feel I have any right to break it down and offer advice - not that any is needed here anyway, and I'll get to why in a moment.
    The only comment on the writing I'll make is the line "...every time you kiss me, my lips are covered in gunpowder" - this is truly brilliant: moving, sad, tragic, beautiful - all these words come to mind when reading that line. I say beautiful simply from a poetic point of view, I should point out!

    I said above, no advice was needed here. I stick firm to that. Too often poetry is "over-produced" - polished to the point where any original emotion and meaning is lost for a purely synthetic finish, as it were. It might be pleasing to read, but it is fake - it is written for the reader's pleasure, almost. This isn't. This is raw, brutal, honest and brilliant and says something as all the very best poetry should.
    I would also like to say congratulations on your win, but even that seems entirely inconsequential to the piece. Some writes transcend judgement and competitions - this certainly does.

    All the very best,
    Ben

    • 1 year ago

      by nourayasmine

      Thank you. I appreciate your kind words and thoughts.

  • 1 year ago

    by AngelaLuisaCory

    This brought me near to tears - it's so beautiful and tragic at the same time

  • 1 year ago

    by Em

    This is captivating from beginning to end. It grips at the heart strings as i can see it is very personal and honest.
    The content is brilliant and written flawlessly.

  • 1 year ago

    by Em

    This is captivating from beginning to end. It grips at the heart strings as i can see it is very personal and honest.
    The content is brilliant and written flawlessly.

  • 1 year ago

    by IdTakeABulletForYou

    Great, moving write! This deserved the win! Well done!

    V/r
    IdTakeABulletForYou

  • 1 year ago

    by Maher

    This is amazing and it hit me quite hard.

    My mother's family are still in Syria, half of which we've not heard from in years. Some of my father's family also. My parents are constantly watching the news here, trying to keep updated with what's happening on the ground. The only channels that broadcast it are the Arab ones, which makes it seem like the rest of the world doesn't care - although I know there are some who do. It seems that celebrity distractions and material things are being plastered everywhere to stop the world from caring about situations such as yours.

    There's not much more I can say, because you know these things better than I do, no doubt. All I can say is, may Allah grant peace to Al-Sham and every other region in such a state.

    Salaams

    • 1 year ago

      by nourayasmine

      Thanks for the comment. Hope your friends and family are safe too.

  • 1 year ago

    by Maple Tree

    Judge Comments:

    Noura takes you to a place where your soul cries....

    When destruction and war is all around you, the emotions can kill a heart, within this piece Noura pleads for her love to unite in love and yet to save their homeland... just a heartbreaking poem and written in true form by Noura.. Powerful poem by this lovely lady!

  • 1 year ago

    by Melpomene

    Did this really not end up on the front page?

    Noura, no poet on this site is able to write anything as raw as this poem. By the end I was overwhelmed by emotion and that does not happen often for me when reading poetry on this site. The way you are able to write with such honest really does send shivers down my spine and this poem is one I will continue to return to read for a very long time.

    I hope you are well my friend.

  • 1 year ago

    by Saerelune

    Got back from a long long break, so sorry for the late post, but here's the comment I wrote as a judge back then:

    "It didn't take long to realize that this poem would be filled with emotion as I read the first two lines, although I think it might have been more powerful to do without the enjambment and merge those two lines, just to start off the poem with a bigger punch. But that's just a tiny technical note, also regarding the flow. What I liked about this poem is that it wasn't just a simple jumble of fancy imagery, because the imagery was actually put together very well with the use of repetition, making the poem well-rounded. The echoes of a "home" are evident within almost each stanza, and so is the reminder of weapons. I love the contrast between the two personas, how they are probably a couple but both have a different vision of "all they have". The mention of the khaki suit also tied so well with the previous stanza about the news. There are subtle reminders everywhere that connect the imagery, and the emotions that are evoked only strengthen them. This poem portrayed such an important issue yet manages to make it intimate and personal, pulling the reader in with emotions. Nice work."

  • 10 months ago

    by ddavidd

    This songs of freedom!
    it's all I ever have
    it's
    all I ever be.
    (( playing with Bob's lyric a bit))

    beautifully pend!!