Sipping on my coffee, it came to mind
that my thoughts haven't turned to you,
the one of the nightmares you held,
where you painted my body black and blue.
I often thought of you when I left, wondered
if I could have helped your violent attacks
but then it dawned on me that no matter what
I'd have done, you'd still overreact.
Once, I loved you but now...
now I hate your mere existence
and your presence makes my skin crawl,
I'm just glad that between us, there's distance.
Please, stop telling me you love me because
if you did, why paint your fists upon my face?
Why couldn't you just be a loving man
instead and shower me in a warm embrace?
I'm not as naive as I used to be when with you so
there's no use in sorry, I don't believe it anymore,
just stop, I want to be covered in kisses and
be met with a loving man, when I walk through the door.
There was obviously a lot of power and emotion in what you were saying, but the rhythm of the piece I felt was a little off. It sort of stumbled in places, which - for me, personally - distracted me from the message that was being laid bare.
Punctuation aside, this was a powerful write. I could sense your strength, burgeoning with every word that fluttered onto the page from your heart-- a write I'm sure would have hurt you to construct at one point earlier on, but then at the time you wrote this it empowered you in a very critical way. Love is most difficult to comprehend when it hurts you. It leaves you bewildered, and I can definitely understand why you said this write helped you. I hope you still understand how much you're worth, and that you deserve love -- not abuse. The moment a man touches you in such a manner, gimme his name and I'll beat down his door and repay him tenfold.
Abuse, violence of any kind is wrong. To me it's all about power and control. They say they love us but they don't know what love is. Of course it is always our fault and we make them do it. It goes both ways men and women. It starts with verbal and then it goes from there. The people don't change and we have to find the strenght to get away and stay away.Thank you for sharing. Take care and be blessed.
I think this is a very important poem to write and I believe that it might well give inspiration to other women who have been through a violent relationship. I know women and men who have been in such relationships and it is hard when the person you love turns out not to be the person you thought they were.
I loved the start of the poem laying the reassuring foundation of the speaker being in a calm and happier place and who is merely reflecting on past nightmares rather than being in them. It makes it more palatable and a gentler read for those who have never experienced violence in their lives. The gentle expose to violence through the imagery of being painted black and blue is just enough and in its subtlety makes it fit into its position of a fading nightmare.
The reference to her wondering if she could have changed his violent ways but the confirmation that she knew she couldn't. Shows how much she has moved on from the situation.
The visual description of painting his fists upon her face. Again by painting the violence it makes it much softer and palatable because the reality of violence is
so dramatic and ugly that anything more would have ripped the reader from the calm place of where the writer wants them to be.
It is a poem that shows strength and proof that the victim is so much more stronger than she once thought, that she has escaped her past and is no longer fooled by him. She has taken back control of her life and knows what she wants out of life and will achieve it. Out of adversity comes positivity. Very well written really good portrayal of something thankfully not too many people experience. Milly x
Oh Em, this must have been extremely hard to write-beautifully done but unfortunately at the cost of a part of you. This shows how strong you are and a survivor that continues on stronger than ever. Prayers and hugs-Brenda