An unusual first line, baby's breath.
My babies had breath of vomit, milk, baby biscuits or vomit again, hell sometimes all of them.
This is the work of an intelligent mind. Stars are dying, true yet they are often perceived as life or guiding lights. Such imaginative imagery throughout this piece made it stand out from the small crowd for me.
I like the shortened nickname for chrysanthemums, helps the flow and is less of a mouthful.
I love the power of the second last line.
I can hear it as I read it which usually ticks the boxes for me. 4 points