Soothsayer - Senryu (3 parts)

by Maher   Jun 24, 2016


First attempt at a Senryu. My apologies if it's incorrect.
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On with your dark words;
may they reach the sun and burn,
toasted by their lies.

*

Speak of the future;
lie upon lie in all haste,
your vision now lost.

*

Waste in your contract
with Jinn and devils this day;
your soul becomes theirs.

9


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Latest Comments

  • 1 year ago

    by Little Silver Pen

    It is a good Senyru. I can feel the anger.

    Keep writing.

    Check out some of mine too, and please rate it while you're at it.

  • 1 year ago

    by stormingdance (Jessica)

    Excellent use of word play, love it! Your imagery is definitely on point and I also feel the anger, but I feel like there is a heavy sense of finality at the end. But I could be blathering. ;)

    Great work!

    • 1 year ago

      by Maher

      Thank you ma'am. You're right about the end :)

  • 1 year ago

    by Darren

    Judges comment

    I like a senryu, I especially like a triple senryu. No need for the apology. The syllable count is correct, there is plenty of dark imagery here and a turn in each senryu. What I like most about these is the tone, real anger coming through for me. I like how they tell such a story with so few words also. Great job, 10 points.

    • 1 year ago

      by Maher

      Thank you Sir, very much appreciated :)

  • 1 year ago

    by hiraeth

    I gotta say, one hell of a first attempt for it to end up on the front page! Congrats on the win!

    • 1 year ago

      by Maher

      Thank you Sir :)

  • 1 year ago

    by IdTakeABulletForYou

    Many congrats on winning with this beautiful piece!

    S

    • 1 year ago

      by Maher

      Thank you, Sir.