The Cunning Of The Clouds

by Ben Pickard   Aug 25, 2016


The sky swallowed me in its
ambiguous musings and
spat me out with the rain.
I succumbed to the thought
of eternal sunshine,
but it was the clouds that
finally consumed my dreams.

I will not look up with such
opulent amounts of optimism again,
or become the deluge that leaves
the ground sodden in my wake.

--

25/8/16

11


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Latest Comments

  • 1 year ago

    by ether

    I sure do love the word "opulent" - needs to be used more. This was very easy to read and created a pleasant mini cinema in my mind. Lovely.

  • 1 year ago

    by Milly Hayward

    I love the metaphor of the sky swallowing you and spitting you out with the rain.
    Ingenious. How wonderful the way you portray a rainy day overtaking your dreams of
    sunshine. You have a magical way with words that captures the imagination Milly x

  • 1 year ago

    by Dagmar Wilson

    What a lovely write and a title well chosen.
    Growing up I would picture myself sitting on a cloud and just fly away. Even as an adult I like to watch the clouds smoothly moving and I start to daydream. Reality quickly reminds me that it was only a dream. Enjoyed reading and add to my favorite. Take care

    • 1 year ago

      by Ben Pickard

      Thank you, Dagmar. And may I just say, never stop daydreaming!

      SL

  • 1 year ago

    by Augustus Black

    Very magnificent and meaningful.
    Great work . Sir.

  • 1 year ago

    by - Mr. Darcy

    Hello Sir,

    Okay, from the off the alliteration in the title is pleasing. Why? Well, it tells me what kind of mood you're in. Really? No, not really, but it's better that saying this: Wow, I love the title SL, imagine a cunning cloud following you around; sneaking up on you and then 'whollop' letting you have a lightening fork and a tonne of rain! lol

    The first sentence is an absolute joy to read. I have read it over and over and I love its sound, but also, its imagery: The sky consuming consciousness as your mind clouds within it - then suddenly, abruptly you're back, sat at the round table, by a window with King Arthur.

    "What was that Sir" the king bellows, "I thought I'd lost you there, your eyeballs went all white and you started to drool, like a fool"

    "pppperhaps it's the mood I'm in, m'lord'?" Sir L meekly stutters.

    "I have been trying to pull myself out of it, thinking of sunnier days, but..." SL continues

    "but, what my good man" the king urges.

    "well, the more I try to lift my heart, looking for inspiration, the more I seem to feel pain and I feel crushed"

    The King sees his friend, the despair in those hard, but kind eyes and lays a large hand on his metallic shoulder plate. "Lancelot, don't try so hard. You are already more of a man than most will ever be. Be content with who you are and what you gift to this Kingdom."

    The King then pointed out of the stone framed window. "look up there Sir" he pointed at a sky. The southern sky was striated with wispy cloud, but also had bulbous clouds with ominous darkness to the west. "the sky is ever changing, offering both warmth and misery. All you can do it make the best of the weather"

    The King looked into SL's eyes, placed both hands on his mighty broad shoulders and said, "You have a flaming sun in you and you just need to make the most of what you have, feel the fire and harness its power - nobody else can change you, but yourself. Believe in you and you'll go down in history!"

    All the best,

    always,

    michael

    • 1 year ago

      by Ben Pickard

      Michael - thank you for this wonderful, in-depth comment which is perhaps a little more serious than it seems on first reading...

      SL