Thank you. I will defiantly work on that. Like I stated in the pm the hainting face was unintentional, it just appeared when I centered it before posting.
1 year ago
Kasie, you're getting really good at these I think anyway as I'm not sure on iambic pentameter bit the da Dum da Dum seems to be spot on. This is relatable for me as I have suffered the hands of someone I thought loved me. To break it up I have separated the lines into 4 lines then the couplet.
1/ This opening is a hard hitting one that is relatable to many because when you are abused in any way you cannot forget but I guess you can forgive, given time. The pain will never fade but believe me it gets better again, given time in my experience.
2/ The emotion in this part is astounding and honest as those eyes are always uncaring yet full of lust for what they want and it's quite sickening that no matter how much you say no, how loud you say no and how much you try and move away they get what they want with those awful hands.. When it happened to me I could feel his touch for days and it was that, that killed me the most I think. Yes, at the time we feel weak for what happened and blame ourselves but it's not our fault no matter what a woman is wearing at the time like some people seem to think.
3/ I like the rearrangement here of the first four lines and the repetition as to me it shows that every day is a battle trying to get their face out of view as it's blackening every thing and the fact that it's like a vicious cycle trying to forget but being unable to.
Couplet/ Your dreams won't let you sleep as they are nightmares, I get this part and we are unable to establish 'dreams' from reality right?
A very good yet painful sonnet to read.