I think of all the hardships I've had to deal with,
the times I've smiled even when I felt like giving up
Ive been abused beyond repair but I'm still fighting
I've been ridiculed more than I'd care to remember
now I get the last laugh as I may not be beautiful or skinny
but I have the biggest heart anyone could imagine
and even when times are tough I think back to how things could have been so much worse
then realise I'm lucky because other people would have given up the ghost long ago
but me I'm strong even if right now I don't feel it.
"now I get the last laugh as I may not be beautiful or skinny
but I have the biggest heart anyone could imagine"
- these two lines really got to me. I relate to not being perfect but just caring so much and being taken for granted so much despite how much I care. I sometimes feel I care so much, it exhausts me so deeply, that I just shut down my caring mechanism and opt into nihilism. Regardless, I went on a bit of a tangent there, you definitely struck a chord with me from these two lines. You are a package deal, you aren't amazing just because of your heart. I stand by that statement.
Overall, it was a great summation of being down on oneself. Knowing that the strength to be positive isn't there, but feeding positivity in amidst all the negativity. Trying to stay afloat by ridding yourself of burdens that are causing you to sink. Conditioning yourself to realize your fortune, even if they don't align with the fantasies in your head of a perfect romance and a tidy sum of money in a bank account at your disposal.
I can vouch for your big heart :) I think you are stronger than you think. You face your demans and carry on - that shows courage and strength.
I think it's the hottest fires that forge the strongest metal. Be true to your heart. Milly x