Devil Race

by Milly Hayward   Oct 15, 2017


The desert scratches sandy hand
Across my throat it draws a band
Tighter, tighter, I cannot breath
I'm trapped in hell, I cannot leave

Devil rides death on my back
Cannot escape his evil track
Intent to squeeze, destroy my soul
He's taken from me, a great toll

Rapes this world of all that's good
Takes the trees for all their wood
Kill animals for needless fun
Earth's armageddon has begun

Hope shinest not, through this dark night
No aid is coming into sight
And still this devil plies his trade
I cannot stop his escapade

I cry to God, please save me Lord
Save my soul, if you can afford
Pray take me from this evil place
Leave of me, not one single trace

For I want no part
of this devil race

6


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Latest Comments

  • 3 months ago

    by IdTakeABulletForYou

    *breath = breathe

    An interesting piece that seems in its entirety to be an allegory alluding to the human race being the Devil. I don't believe in god, but we are akin to a virus on this planet and I agree with your words. The strongest verse here to me was "Hope shinest not, through this dark night" ... though using the word "shinest" kind of broke me out of the piece's world for a moment.

    Great job nonetheless,
    IdTakeABulletForYou

  • 3 months ago

    by Black hole

    Milly, first of all I want to talk about the length of the poem.
    It's perfect.
    I think a rhyming poem should be between 4-6 stanzas.
    sometimes it becomes awkward for the reader to read the poem with few more stanzas, no matter how good the poem is.

    Throughout the poem, you mentioned how we are becoming evil.
    Forgetting the good inside us, the human part of ourselves and focusing on the doing evil things for our fun or curiosity.
    How we are imbalancing the nature.
    Like river are becoming dry and turning into desert and we are left with sand in our hand.
    No water, no irrigated land, no agriculture, no crops.
    What will we eat or drink, sand?
    We will suffocate and see our dear ones suffering the same.
    That's why you pray to God, either cleanses our mind, show us the path towards humanity or take your far away from here to a better place where there are no killings of animals or trees, where there is love.
    Because here you find no chance of escaping from the evil or devil.
    He plays tricks with our minds.
    Or rides our minds and Forces us to do evil things.
    And we are becoming his puppet.
    These killings, imbalancing of the nature will only lead us to the Armageddon of this beautiful planet, we call our home.
    This is what devil wants. He wants to destroy God's most precious creation..
    .
    .
    .
    Humanity.
    He wants to steal humanity from us.
    But I think instead of escaping, we should come together and give a tough blow or punch on the face of devil and show him we really are God's most precious, reliable creation and we can also save this planet.

    That's all from me.
    Forgive me, if I said anything wrong.

    • 3 months ago

      by Milly Hayward

      Dear Black Hole, thank you so much for taking the time to write such a lovely long comment. I'm very pleased that you liked it enough to do so. Please don't worry about saying anything wrong. It's always a pleasure and very refreshing to see one of my poems through the eyes of another.
      Take care and thank you for your comments which I have forwarded to be praised. Best wishes Milly x

  • 3 months ago

    by Einstein

    Milly, I completely agree with you about the loss of innocent lives.
    Every line of this poem is very well written.
    Can't choose any certain stanza.

  • 3 months ago

    by Ben Pickard

    Milly, since joining this site I've seen your poetry (and in particular, your rhyming) go from strength to strength. This is wonderful.

    All the best,

    Ben

    • 3 months ago

      by Milly Hayward

      Thanks Ben, I really appreciate your kind comments and encouragement. As you know I only joined in Feb 2016 and jumped in pretty much as a beginner. I think regularly reading of different styles of poetry and thinking about their compositions for commenting has really helped in the growth of my poetry. thanks again. Best wishes Milly x

  • 3 months ago

    by Dagmar Wilson

    Dear Milly you have a way with describing so well and your honesty I highly commend..What an excellent write and I needed to ready this. Add to my favorite. All the very best.

    • 3 months ago

      by Milly Hayward

      Thank you Dagma. Really appreciate your kind words I'm so glad you liked it enough to add to your favourites. Take care. Milly x

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