Blue Eyes

by C Cattaway   Oct 20, 2017

The sea ripples, waves lapping.
The sky reflects the storm.
The anguish in your eyes of blue,
My tummy knots, forlorn.

I cannot see for looking.
The clouds roll thunderously.
The sheer depths from within your gaze
Has been bothering me.

A cyclone rips these walls apart.
I cannot reach your hand.
Your eyes, blue, darkening with thought,
Doing only what you can.

Did you not think there could be better?
Shadows wait for you.
Your past can't hold a ransom note
When I've been here for you.

If pain of truth, or cuts so deep
Were swirling in my heart,
I too would turn from hope and love.
But your wounds are so dark.

Your mind filled up with heat, and loss.
Can you not find my light?
If I could kiss nightmares away,
I'd wake, to guard your night.

With you within my loving arms,
I'd show you how to try.
Each kiss. Each day with care; with words
To show you how much I

Would try to take your fears away.
You soon would realise
That you could move forward without
Torment, in your blue eyes.


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Latest Comments

  • 5 months ago

    by Kitty Cat Lady

    "Your past can't hold a ransom note"
    Brilliant! I love the idea of love being able to right past wrongs, even though that doesn't always work! Really well written :-)

  • 5 months ago

    by Risqué

    I enjoyed the continued imagery of the blue eyes, and how it followed through the entire poem; it really ties everything together nicely. I enjoyed this journey, thank you.

  • 5 months ago

    by Ben Pickard

    This was indeed honest and emotional work and interestingly rhymed throughout. Thoroughly enjoyed.

    Take care and all the best,


  • 5 months ago

    by BlueJay

    It's a little long for my taste, and there are some things that could have been condensed but otherwise this piece has tons of emotion and a story to it as well so nicely done there. However, some of the rhymes felt not forced, but out of place - you had a decent vocabulary and everything made sense, but the type of words you chose at the beginning of a stanza vs the end of it were different levels and sometimes drastically, which made it difficult to gain a sense of who you are or what the heck your poetic voice really sounds like (which was frustrating for me because that's one of my favorite parts of poetry). But I mean other than that which seems like a big thing, but was actually relatively minor this was a good write and it had some touches of beauty that really left me stunned.

    • 5 months ago

      by C Cattaway

      Thankyou. I write as I think, so it's always a rough draft, except I don't know how to edit. In this instance, though, I didn't really know how to say what I wanted, so it's jilted because it was the only way I could write it.
      I don't really have a poetic voice. I just have thoughts jangling away, that I can make neither head nor tail of. I hope that as I fathom these emotions, I'll start to make more sense, because I found its flow weong, too, & my use of some words, as you say, which had no place there. x

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