Sorry, Love Daddy

by Ben Pickard   Nov 1, 2017


And as the clouds amassed and the cruel north wind blew,
It didn't matter once that the sun still warmed our home;
The earth still shook, whilst the pressure built and grew,
And now my pen and I write odes to you alone.
The dynamite was lit a good long time ago -
You mustn't ever think you were the final match or flame;
My arrows missed their mark because I have a crooked bow,
And if I shot them now, I'd miss the mark again.
It was the ropes, you see, and the mooring went all wrong;
The caustic current always beat me to the land.
Those others stroll a stroll while mine is hard and long -
I crawl on bended knee but they walk tall and stand.
Each lullaby I sang to you was always out of key -
The notes all burdened with my troubles and my woes -
And even this is a bent and crooked symphony:
A poem pecked by ravens, rooks and crows.
My children, all - I want to tell you this:
I am failing you by slow and sad degrees.
But know that through the storms and through the blinding mist,
I am sorry - so sorry -

Love Daddy

--

Ben Pickard 2017

11


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Latest Comments

  • 1 week ago

    by Alice

    Wow, this is sad and atmospheric... Love the metaphors and little bits of alliteration. Parents can be so hard on themselves.

  • 2 weeks ago

    by Meena Krish

    A moving write from a father's heart to his children. A write
    any parents and the children who are now parents and so on it goes...
    we make mistakes wanting the best and as parents we can't let go and
    hey sometimes it can be right too. Its the cycle of life where we learn from
    our parents and perhaps try to do better...take care ~

  • 2 weeks ago

    by Yakori bint Muhammed

    This is a saddening piece that consumes one. I've noticed how parents while trying to give their children the best in life do end up being too hard on themselves. There's no manual out there on being the best parents and raising children. Life will always fling unwelcoming shades and one must navigate through any circumstances therein. That's natures way and man has little control whatsoever in changing such navigations. And in mosts cases, one learns to accept all without fighting life's compass. The end always produces more love, understanding, empathy and devotion in the family unit. Don't be hard on you at all. It's not bad to at times seek out time to clear the stormy waters on your path. It makes you human.

    Let go to receive that love you give out. You'll have more to share to your adorable family. Be happy always and you're very much fine. The kids love Daddy and we all love you.

    I loved the end rhyme scheme evident throughout the poem. It adds a serenade to the poem.

    I noticed an alliteration and repetition on the 11th line.
    "stroll a stroll"
    Loved it.
    You while relaying such deep and soulful lines used figurative expressions beautifully. You're a master in the art of using such devices. I'm learning from you.

    Thanks for sharing this. It's a melancholic piece yet, thrusts the heart reflectively about love and empathy.
    Love, light and peace.
    Be merry!

    • 2 weeks ago

      by Ben Pickard

      Yakori, what a lovely comment. Thank you.

  • 2 weeks ago

    by Em

    Ben, this brought a tear to my eye each time I read it and I've read it quite a few times now and I've been unable to comment until now. I'm glad this is nominated and I know that parents all want the best for their children and will always question the decisions we make for them and also for ourselves but I truly believe that even though (through depression) you feel you have failed them that you have not and that they'll love you even if they say they hate you because I for one have screamed I hate you to my Mum and my goodness did I regret it especially now as I have grown up and know that even though we didn't have everything when I was younger we had our Mum and she tried her best and that is all we can do.

    Take care and you know where I am if you need a rant.

    Em x

  • 2 weeks ago

    by deeplydesturbed

    Benny - what can I say...
    This was so.... hauntingly familiar with so many parents. I know my dad has appologised to us many a times for his actions, yet as a child, I love him more than ever.
    You are doing fantastic Benny. Im sure of it. Brenda made some excellent points.
    All you can do, is do the best you can... And Benny, im sure you are.
    You are slowly showing your children the world with the vacations you take, im sure they have excellent schooling. and with a man who can spurt out poetry like this, im sure they are doing well..
    no matter what, you have not failed as a parent.

    Sorry for the lengthy comment sir...
    Much Love Benny.
    If you ever need anything, anything at all.... just message.

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