You failed to mention above that great poetry is also with you. Hey the visuals here are intricately described, created a very silent and vacant atmosphere. Not to mention the pauses of course, you are the master of that. Great write here, Michael.
The flow here is incredible, I couldn't believe I'd already reached the end so I reread the piece about a dozen times. Each time my heart broke a little more. But I feel like the techniques here and the style were all very well used. You had a fantastic rhythm and the way you broke up your stanzas felt perfect. Now on for the loneliness theme, you captured it immaculately. Excellently sorrowfully penned piece.