Comments : Within The Rain

  • 9 months ago

    by Em (marmite)

    Title: I imagined dancing in the rain without a care in the world but as I read the content it's as if the rain (misery) follows you wherever you should go.
    1/ The urgency and emotion is quite clear here - you have waited a lifetime for this special someone to come along but it's as though you still need/want this person to feel whole or anything other than sadness atleast, wouldn't it be swell?
    2/ firstly I love the throat/most rhyming very cleverly done (I wouldn't have thought about it) this stanza makes me feel that you have sort of found that special person but it makes you feel pain like never before as they've either not notice you or you've been friends some time
    3/ this makes me feel as though this person got closer to you or let you get close to them then pushed you away which is very relatable and depressing
    4/ a fabulous ending
    This really gave me an heavy heart and brought tears to my eyes.

    Take care Ms

  • 9 months ago

    by Kitty Cat Lady

    So bittersweet Catherine. Beautifully written! :-) x
    =^.^=