Nice form, I wrote one of these many moons ago. An underused form on this site
This is a good write.
well done.

Mr D this is superb...

I really like this Michael and have never seen the form before :-) Great metaphors for depression and vivid imagery! :-) x
=^.^=

Interesting form...am just hearing of it, so thank you for
posting. I like how as the number of lines in each stanza reduces,
the build up of the write takes the reader along too. Nicely done
with yet another form!

Mr D.. I keel reading and reading this and each time it gives me the chills but also makes me smile why?? Because i imagine we've all wished someone would diminish (if that's the correct word) and I for one have wished my ex would die so he doesn't inflict the pain he did on me to anyone else as I wouldn't be able to forgive myself.
The title is a super one and it makes me think of the tide coming in and when it does weeping as it's covering up the sand thus disallowing people to take a midnight stroll on the beach but unfortunately that's life or maybe the sea has seen some things ie people going overboard or my words fear drowning. Very clever anyway.
1) Wow the imagery here is excellent and one which made me whince a little. I imagined an anger building up deep within you one which was uncontrollable ending in blood red tears and just to know you're still alive you taste it.. This to me speaks of some kind of control/abuse though maybe I read too much into it
2) here, my first thought was of depression of suicidal thoughts in one's head of how you (the royal you) could end it then I reread and again I came to the conclusion of control and of how one could kill to save themselves the despair of more heartache, more pain, more abuse... Again its possible I've read more into it
3) Here is a very vivid image of you inhaling through tears then exhaling through relief which makes me believe this was about some form of abuse as you wouldn't be relieved if someone you loved died... Would you?
4) A fantastic and well laid out ending I must say and somewhat fascinating and leaves my brain ticking over.
Take care
Em x

Michael, cool as hell write. Love the type of poem this is and I thank you for explaining how its done, fascinating.

There are things within us that will never truly die, but will lurk in the shadows... old pains, memories and projections of 'loved ones' who never allowed us to be the giants that we are ( all are, in essence).

The only thing I can say is: allow the pain to be there and watch it subside again. All that is not allowed to be, tends to grow.

You are a diamond, never forget.

XX ((hugs)) Ingrid

Erm.. everything that Em (Marmite) wrote! Haha. I was really hit by this. I found the intensity really chilling (horror, not relaxing!). I'm sorry I didn't see it sooner. I really don't understand different poetry styles, so it's lovely thst you explained it at the end. It also works incredibly because of how it meant the end came slowly, & short.
I could dribble on with some more praise & nonsensical drivel, but it's only because I'm absolutely taken with this. It has made rather an impact! Great job. Well done.
Much love,
Catherine x

How do I delete a comment? I've edited it.. you don't need my long comment twice! ;-) x