The Closet.

by Fenrir   Jun 7, 2018


I remember, hiding behind closed doors. A dark and tight space. With only the soft fabric clothes that dangled above, tickling the back of my neck.

Two solid wooden doors, keeping me trapped. One of them was fear. My own fear. What can I expect? Disappointment? The other was rejection. Rejection from those of my blood. Rejection from the friends in my heart.

And there it was, the bright light that shone through the slit inbetween those doors, warmth, love, acceptance. Awaiting my presence, calling me out. I couldn't help but to leave the dark and enter this light.

I... finally left my shell.
I came out of my closet.
--------------------------------------------
Authors note: In honour of pride month, I decided to share my experience of how it felt to be trapped in a closet. Metaphorically, of course.
15 years of being "gay".
Oh but mother. Prehaps it's just a phase.

3


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Latest Comments

  • 3 months ago

    by Poet on the Piano

    Eeek!! (that's an exclamation of excitement!)

    I was so hoping this poem would be about "coming out of the closet", and I must say, I am proud of you and I hope you are proud of yourself for sharing this. Perfect to share for pride month as well.

    It's ridiculous and kind of heartbreaking to have someone else think they know us enough to comment on our sexuality, or who we are. I was told by my father last year that my bisexuality was "just a phase", and that statement is not only harmful, but can invalidate the very reality in which we live in and the way we feel.

    Hope you continue to write and happy pride month. I'm so happy you accepted yourself and know that there will be those who will always accept you, even if those people aren't "blood relatives" so to speak. Live your most authentic life ^_^

    • 3 months ago

      by Fenrir

      Thank you so much! For your words are beautiful, the first step to happiness is accepting yourself. (In my eyes.)
      Thank you so much for reading this.

  • 3 months ago

    by Em (marmite)

    The comments like "it's only a phase" etc etc are just as bad (in my opinion) as someone saying to a depressed person "you have nothing to be sad about..." good on you for sharing this, alot of people play pretend throughout their lives unfortunately because their fear never goes. Take care

    • 3 months ago

      by Fenrir

      I agree, I've heard many people say "it's just a phase". Like, what mindset do you have to tell someone who has had the guts to be themself.
      I understand the "you have nothing to be sad about" comments, as I use to work round the house as my mother use to have severe depression and still does.
      It's shocking people have the idea to tell you how to run your life.

  • 3 months ago

    by - Mr. Darcy

    I'm sure you'll grow out of it! Lol
    Seriously, good for you sharing your experience.
    Is there a typo "shun" should be "shone" ??

    Take care.

    • 3 months ago

      by Fenrir

      There was a typo there, fixed it. Thank you for pointing it out.

  • 3 months ago

    by .k.u.s.h.q.u.e.e.n.c.j.

    This should totally be nominated for a contest ! If only I had that power. The emotion in this is nothing short of reachable. I'm sorry you had to witness such hatred but I am glad to see you have overcome those insecurities. Never be afraid to be yourself no matter how hard someone tries to bring you down. As there will always be people somewhere, somehow waiting to release their cruel insults. Don't listen to that negativity. I don't personally know you, though I can say you are better than that nonsense.
    Lovely peice. Don't ever stop writing.

    • 3 months ago

      by Fenrir

      Thank you so much for your kind words <3

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